the lightning in their souls
by Caught Ink Handed
Summary: What if Anya hadn't been killed that night outside Camp Jaha? What if she had made it back to speak with the Commander?
1. the sun rose in the west today

**the lightning in their souls**

 **i. the sun rose in the west today.**

 ***all dialogue in italics is trigedasleng**

 _13 years earlier…_

The scent of blood permeated Anya's nose along with the metallic clash of steel on steel; but she paid it no notice. The only thing she knew was the feel of her blade in her palm and the narrow field of vision in front of her. She vaguely knew of some pain in her side, a wound long since overcome by adrenaline.

She slashed down at the warrior rushing towards her, neatly slicing through her opponent's armor. Anya spun gracefully away, dancing through the streams of blood, the hiss of her blade her music.

Anya paused momentarily, her eyes sweeping over the hilly landscape. Her moment of respite was brief as somebody shouted behind her. Anya barely managed to duck under the axe before it slashed through the air where her head had previously been. Anya sliced at the tall man as he spun back around to swing his axe towards her.

She ducked and weaved away from the axe-wielder, unable to get close enough to land a hit. She stabbed wildly at him, aiming for the exposed underbelly.

Just after one of her blades had nicked his underarm, the sound of a horn reverberated through the valley. Three short blasts followed it. Anya wasted no time stabbing her blade into his leg before turning and running back towards her clan's base. From the trees, a volley of arrows picked off a few of the Rock warriors as the two armies dropped back behind their lines.

" _Onya!_ " Anya froze at the sound of her name, spinning instantly to find the source.

" _Tarus!_ " She looped an arm underneath her fellow second, supporting his weight as he tied off a wound on his upper thigh.

" _Mochof,_ " The man grunted out as he extracted himself from her arms. They jogged towards the command tent, shouting out greetings to their fellows.

As she entered the command tent, Anya sheathed her swords. " _Onya, have you seen Theia?_ " Somebody called from other side.

" _Theia? No_." Anya shrugged a shoulder, snagging a piece of cloth to stem the bleeding on her upper arm. An argument on the other side of the tent piqued Anya's interest and she moved closer.

" _Bern, we cannot retreat. If we retreat, the Rock Clan will have another foothold in our territory. And in any case, that is not your decision to make. We will wait until Theia returns._ "

Bern let out a harsh laugh, " _We do not have the numbers to force them back. We are stretched too thin._ "

The argument began to spread around the tent until the entire leadership of the Trikru was bickering amongst themselves. Anya watched as hands dropped to swords and voices reached a fever pitch.

" _Enough!_ " Anya yelled as she made her way to the center of the room. " _You argue like yongon. Bern is right, we do not have the numbers to force the Rock Clan back. But we can deal them a deathblow along their flank. They have concentrated their strongest warriors here,_ " Anya pointed with her dagger to a spot along the edge of the forest. " _Our archers will create a distraction with their warriors in the center. We will come up through the trees and take them by surprise. Once weakened along their left flank, only a fool would stay this far extended. They will be forced back._ "

A moment of silence shuddered through the tent. Then voices bubbled to life again, " _Aren't you Theia's second? What gives you the right to order us? We follow Theia._ " Bern shouted, his eyes blazing.

" _She is right. I will follow her._ " A voice called from the back. Indra stepped forward, " _Theia is dead._ " Anya fought to keep her face from crumbling away, her heart thudding more painfully that any sword. She stood straighter, pushing away the pain that infiltrated her chest.

" _We fight when the sun sets._ " Anya declared, casting her eyes around the tent for any opposition. 

The two mud-covered women gripped arms, a sense of understanding passing between them. Anya was the first to break away, "I will go and request an audience with the Commander."

"Please hurry," Clarke's blue eyes shone through the darkness as Anya nodded.

Anya then turned and faded back into the trees. A spray of gunfire flew past Clarke, eliciting a scream from the Sky-person.

Anya watched as a group of people in dark clothing descended on the girl, dragging her back to the compound. Once the girl was with her people again, Anya turned and ran. She needed to find Lexa, even if Lexa wouldn't speak to her.

Her body ached more than it had in years as she wove in and out of the trees under the moonlight. There was a hunger set into her bones and the wound on her arm throbbed painfully, reminding her of _Muan-de_. The mere thought of what those _Maunon_ had done, were doing to her people was enough to fuel her body with angry energy.

The stars still lighting the sky, the smokes of the Commander's camp marked the sky. Anya's eyes narrowed as she reached the top of the small hill before the camp.

Anya slipped past the sentry, having long since memorized their patterns. Sticking to the shadows, she makes it to the Commander's tent. A lean figure paced back and forth through the shadows: the Commander. Anya hesitated for a moment, keenly aware again of the pain permeating her body. But Anya pushed it to the back of her mind and slipped into the Commander's tent.

" _Heya Heda_ ," the words came out in a rasp, Anya's voice suffering from her exhaustion.

The Commander jumped slightly, breaking from her thoughts. Gustus was on Anya in a split second. Anya simply grinned at the large man as he held a knife to her throat.

" _You should be paying more attention to your surroundings, Heda._ " Anya commented drily, ignoring the knife.

" _Onya_." Lexa sighed, probably softer than she would've liked. " _Gostos, let her up._ " The large man took a step back, his focus solely on the Commander.

" _I didn't recognize you with all that filth on your face_." Gustus grunted with a nod to Anya. Anya flashed a smile towards Gustus, her teeth stark against the mud.

" _Leave us, Gostos_."

" _I'll bring Onya some clothes. You smell like a horse._ "

The pair stared at each other for a moment. Lexa looked sadder than when Anya had last seen her one on one. Her paint had been wiped from her eyes, leaving her face young. The green eyes that Anya had once seen so full of life seemed devoid of any joy.

" _I thought you were dead_." Lexa breathed out, and Anya recognized her second for the first time since she had entered the tent.

" _It takes more than the Sky People or the Maunon to end my fight, Leksa_." At Anya's words, a slight shudder ran through Lexa. In a fleeting, heartbreaking moment, Anya wondered how long it had been since somebody had called her Lexa and not Heda. Lexa inhaled a shaky breath, nodding.

" _Your warriors…they are all dead. Burned alive. How did you survive?_ "

" _By the Sky People. I know. I was captured by the Maunon._ " Anya spat the word out like poison, which is what the Maunon were. The crease in Lexa's brow deepened as Anya continued, " _Do you know what they are doing?_ "

" _Other than turning my warriors into ripas?_ " Anya tensed at Lexa's tone, full of anger and hate, a direct representation of her own emotions.

" _They are draining our people of their blood. Using it as medicine_." Lexa seemed to crumple slightly. The change was subtle, only a select few would've noticed it. " _The Maunon hold us in cages like animals._ " A growl was ripped from Lexa's throat as she resumed her pacing, her hand clutched at her sword.

" _How are you here?_ "

Anya let out a low chuckle, " _The Sky People. Their leader, Klark. The Sky People were also captured, but they were not held in cages. Klark found us though and released me. We fled._ " Anya continued recounting her story as Lexa paced back and forth, tension rolling off her in waves.

" _There are more Sky People. More of their ships fell from the sky. I have scouts watching them. I have put a bounty on them_."

" _Tell your scouts to be wary, especially at night. The Sky People are like scared children, willing to harm anything that walks in shadow. I saw them shoot at one of their own, Klark_."

" _Klark? She is the one who met you on the bridge, is she not?_ "

" _Sha, she would like to meet with you_." Lexa's eyebrows nearly disappeared into her hair. " _She believes that the only way to take down the mountain is an alliance between our two people_."

" _What do you believe_?"

Anya paused, " _I think you should consider it. I believe that Klark has pure intentions. But I do not know about the rest_." Lexa nodded, examining the map carefully, her shoulders drawn up in tension.

" _I will think about it. One of the Sky People fell in the Lost Zone. He is in a holding cell. Rivo is bringing one of their leaders here. He will be here in the morning. Indra says there was another ripa attack on her village and Lincoln was taken_."

" _That natrona_ ," Anya growled, " _What was he doing near Tondc_?"

Lexa shrugged dispassionately, " _I know not. Nor do I care._ " Anya watched her former second pace.

" _When did you last sleep?_ " Anya asked, breaking Lexa from her thoughts. Lexa stared at her in surprise, " _You left Polis 2 days ago. Have you slept since you made camp?_ "

" _I've been busy._ "

" _Sleep, Leksa._ "

" _You are not my nomon, Onya_ ," growled the younger woman, her eyes angry, but guarded.

" _No, I'm not. But I know if you don't sleep, you will not be able to function well. I will leave you to rest. Think about the alliance with the Sky People, beja._ " Anya nodded in deference to her Commander before turning to leave the tent.

" _Onya,_ " Lexa called out softly. Anya turned back around, her head tilted in question, " _I'm glad you're alive._ " Lexa took a few steps forward until she was a step away from her mentor. The two gripped arms tightly.

" _Me too._ "

Lexa's nose wrinkled, " _Please go and bathe, Onya. What is your fascination with mud?_ " She let out a breathy chuckle.

" _Of the two of us, you seemed to spend an awful lot of time covered in it not me._ " Anya said as she stepped towards the exit.

As Anya slipped out, Lexa said, " _Only because you pushed me in it._ "

All traces of mud scrubbed from her skin, and clean clothes on her back, Anya confidently walked into the Commander's tent. Lexa was lounging on her throne, as she was apt to do, with Gustus by her side.

" _Heda_ ," Anya nodded sharply to Lexa, " _Have you thought further about our conversation?_ "

" _Yes, the mountain has cast a shadow over our people for far too long and if the Sky People will help us destroy it, then I am willing to meet with them. I do wish to speak with the Sky People we have captured at some point. You may trust Klark, but what of the new invaders?_ "

" _I know nothing of them_." Anya answered, " _Just that they were willing to shoot blindly into the forest. And that there are more of them. Klark warned me that there would be more when we spoke on the bridge._ "

" _Very well. Break bread with me, Onya?_ " A glimmer of something, perhaps hope, fluttered in the Commander's eyes.

" _Of course, Heda. It would be my pleasure._ " Lexa gestured to the small table in a corner, laden with food. As the pair sat, Gustus stepped out of the tent. The hunger that had been slowly gnawing at Anya's stomach roared to life as she took in the spread.

" _Please, eat, Onya._ " Lexa leaned back in her chair as Anya tore into a piece of bread.

The two ate in silence until Lexa spoke, " _Your swords and headband were abandoned at the Sky camp if you would like them back._ " Anya shot a glare her way as if to say: if I would like them back? Lexa rose gracefully and retrieved a small bundle. " _I couldn't..._ " Lexa hesitated, her cheeks fighting back a flush of pink, " _I didn't want to believe that you were dead._ " Anya nodded brusquely, willing to allow Lexa to hide her weakness.

The silence returned to the tent as sunlight began to filter more fully in. " _What can you tell me about the Mountain?_ "

" _I did not see much of it. But Klark says that the Maunon use our blood to heal themselves_."

Lexa stood up abruptly, anger coursing through her. " _Why?_ "

" _They cannot be exposed to the air. They have hidden beneath their mountain for too long._ "

" _And the Sky People, they will stand with us?_ "

" _Yes, their children are held within the Mountain._ "

" _Gostos, send word to the Sky People that I will meet with this Klark to discuss peace in one day's time._ "

Anya busied herself with reattaching her weapons to her body as Lexa examined her map. One of her generals entered with an update on their numbers. His eyes widened at the sight of Anya, but said nothing.

As Lexa spoke with each of her generals, Anya watched. It had been almost a year since she had been allowed in Lexa's presence outside of the context of a larger meeting. Lexa's shoulders were drawn back tighter than before and her hand was quick to find the hilt of her blade. The light that Costia had drawn out of her seemed to be nearly extinguished, and for good reason.

But all the same, to see the girl who Anya had watched grow up into the Commander so broken crushed something deep within Anya. That small part of her heart that had not been hardened long ago.

" _Heda._ " A familiar voice snapped Anya out of her thoughts and she turned to see Indra, flanked by Gustus, a furious expression on her features.

" _Indra, what news do you bring?_ "

" _The Sky People...one of their people fired upon the innocents of my village. Elders, children, mothers. 18 lie dead. They rounded them up like animals and fired upon them._ "

Anya let out a low curse, her hand like Lexa's dropped to the hilt of her sword. The expression on Lexa's face could only be described as pure, unadulterated fury.

" _I want blood. Jus drien jus duan._ " Indra's voice came out in low hiss. Lexa nodded sharply; she would not deny her general blood. " _You have a Sky Person in your hold._ "

" _Yes._ "

" _I want him dead_ ," Indra seethed.

" _No._ " Lexa's voice rang through the tent.

Indra's eyes narrowed and she took a step towards Lexa. Anya was up in an instant, the sword that had been resting across her lap at her side. " _We need the Sky People to take down the Muan-de._ "

" _I thought you were dead._ " Indra glanced towards Anya. " _We do not need them. They are children. They have no sense of honor, no knowledge of battle._ "

" _That may be. But without their weapons, we cannot destroy the Muan-de. You saw the destruction at their first camp. They burned 300 of my warriors alive. They carry the weapons of the Muan-de. If we ally ourselves with the Sky People, the Muan-de will fall._ " Lexa's voice remained strong even as Indra's jaw locked and her eyes hardened.

Indra nodded nonetheless, " _I want the ripa. He will pay for his crimes. Only then will I respect this alliance._ "

" _I expected nothing less. The people of Tondc will see justice._ " Lexa took a step forward, extending her arm. Indra grasped it tightly, her eyes bleeding with the anger and grief of her village. " _You have my word, Indra._ "

" _Mochof, Heda._ " Indra bowed her head and took her leave.

" _Well, this complicates things_." Anya let out a bark of laughter, dry and cold.

There had been no further word from the Skaikru, except for a prisoner by the name of Marcus Kane who wished to speak to Lexa in order to establish peace, but he did not know of Lexa's message. Lexa had him jailed along with the man called Jaha. Neither man had received food or water.

" _We must know of the Skaikru's intentions. Onya says they want peace, but then they attack one of our villages. Their words say one thing while their actions say another._ "

" _And how do you propose that, Heda?_ " Gustus asked, his back stiff.

" _I worry that they may not respond well to direct questioning. I do not trust them._ "

" _As is expected, Heda. They have given you no reason to trust in them. Perhaps torture?_ "

Anya let out a scoff, " _And then ask them to make an alliance with us? Gostos, you are smarter than that._ " Gustus pinned her with a harsh glare, but said nothing. Lexa hesitated in her pacing, her eyes thoughtful. " _You have something, Heda?_ "

" _Perhaps_ ," began Lexa, " _What if they do not know that I am Heda? If I pose as a servant girl, while one of you two pose as Heda, and tell them one of them must kill the other. That will reveal their true nature._ "

Anya had to fight back an eye roll, " _Heda, there must be another way._ "

" _Please, tell me, Onya._ " Lexa growled, turning sharply to face her mentor.

" _Onya is right, Heda. This is too risky. We know nothing of the Skaikru._ " Gustus said, but Lexa would not listen, already partway through unbuckling her shoulder guard.

" _Which one of you will pose as Heda?_ "

Anya and Gustus shared a long-suffering look, neither one of them willing to give into the younger woman's demands. After a long moment, Gustus stepped forward. " _I will, Heda. I believe I appear more imposing on first meeting than either of you._ "

" _I take offense at that_ ," Anya commented drily, dropping down into one of the chairs.

" _I will go make all the arrangements, Heda._ "

Lexa nodded. As Gustus left the tent, Lexa began to rid herself of all the markings of Heda. First to go was her armor, leaving her in light clothing. Lexa stripped off her shirt of fine cloth, exchanging it for a thin training shirt. Her face was not covered in any paint, nor did her forehead bear the mark of Heda.

" _Your braids,_ " Anya said, gesturing at the elaborate braids that denoted Lexa's status. " _You need to cover them._ "

" _Mochof, Onya_." Lexa retrieved a head cover and slid it over her hair. " _And now?_ "

" _I could push you in the mud. That would complete your image as serving girl._ " Lexa glared at her, " _Sha, Heda. Don't forget your supplies,_ " Anya gestured to the table. " _This may be one of your most ridiculous plans yet,_ " Anya said as she followed Lexa from the tent. Gustus stood in front of the holding cell, the guards standing by his side.

" _We await you, Heda._ "

" _Mochof, Gostos. You will give them a knife and instruct them that one must die. It will show me their true strength and their honor. I do not want any interruptions until I give a signal. Onya, stay in the shadows, but make sure you can see me._ " Gustus shifted the shoulder guard uncomfortably, causing Anya to bite back a grin. Lexa motioned for Gustus to proceed, and then fell into step behind him. Anya followed, her hand resting comfortably on her knife.

The dark haired man leaped to his feet as Gustus entered, but the other remained and the ground. With the briefest of glances towards Lexa, Gustus nodded to the guards. They landed a few punches on the other man while his companion shouted, "Stop. We came in peace. We came in peace. Please!" The guards froze at Gustus' nod, but they hauled the dark skinned man to his feet.

Anya glared at the two men as Lexa limped over to the corner, her shoulders hunched over the jug of water. In almost any other situation, Anya would have mocked her former second. But now was not the time. Anya's mask, perfected over the years, was firmly in place, just as Gustus' and Lexa's were.

"You speak of peace, while you send an assassin into one of my villages." Gustus' strong voice echoed in the chamber.

"What are you talking about?"

"Blood," Gustus began, then looked over to the second man, "must have blood." Anya handed Gustus one of her knives, "One of you will die here today by the other's hand. I will hear the terms of your surrender from the man who lives." The knife fell to the ground amongst the leaves. He turned to Lexa, who was doing a wonderful job of looking smaller than usual. " _Fetch us when it's done._ " He nodded slightly to his Commander before turning and leaving.

Anya was the last to leave, choosing to linger by the door in case something went wrong. She trusted Lexa. This was not the first time they had executed such a plan. But the Skaikru were a completely unknown element.

Lexa glanced towards the door, noticing the faint gleam of Anya's hair.

"They want us to turn on each other." The angry one said darkly.

Lexa cut in, "They want justice."

"Lives have been lost on both sides." The one who wished for peace argued. Lexa turned calmly to face him, not disguising her contempt for the Sky People. The man seemed to become angry, ripping his jacket off and yelling, "That's why we need to end this war."

Lexa feigned a flinch and rolled her eyes, making eye contact with Anya who nodded slightly, sharing an eye roll. The first man approached Lexa, crouching down next to her. Anya gripped her knife tighter, but made no move. "What's your name?"

"Lexa."

"Lexa. I'm Thelonious. This is Marcus." Lexa kept her features neutral, but couldn't help but wonder at the stupidity of the Sky People. "Your commander spoke of an assassin in a village."

"Yes. Eighteen of our people were murdered." Lexa fought to hold her composure, wanting nothing more than to dispatch of the Sky people and get blood for her people. "Elders." Lexa said sharply, "Children." The two men shared a look. The air in the cell seemed to gain in tenseness.

"We had nothing to do with that," Marcus said firmly.

"It doesn't matter. The commander thinks you did. One of you must pick up that knife. That is our way."

"And if we refuse?" The one who called himself Thelonious asked.

Lexa turned to face him, "Then the commander will use it to slit both of your throats." Lexa did not seek out blood shed, but the Skaikru ended the lives of 18 innocents and they must pay. Lexa shrugged a shoulder as the two men stared at the dagger in abject horror. Lexa said no more; she had planted the seed. Now they must fulfill her orders.

Finally, Thelonious said, "This has gone on long enough. There has to be some other way to resolve this. Something we haven't thought of yet."

"There isn't," Lexa said flatly, her eyes seemingly staring blankly ahead.

Marcus agreed darkly, a sense of determination seeping into his voice. That piqued Lexa's interest.

"We can offer a trade. These people are primitive. I've seen how they live." Lexa shifted, every nerve in her body screaming for her to attack the man. Her people were not primitive. They were strong; they survived; they had not fled to the sky or below the earth; they endured. "Our technology, our medicine. All we'd ask for is peace in return." Lexa would rather die than agree to that trade. And she would; her generals would call for her death, citing weakness.

These people did not want peace.

"If we truly want peace, they told us how to get it." Marcus said softly as if he was resigned to his fate.

"Through murder?"

"Through sacrifice." Lexa glanced towards the man. He was willing to die for peace, to pay for the sins of his people. This was what she had sought to find. But the other man concerned her. He would have to be dealt with.

Marcus moved to pick up the knife while the other tried to stop him. "If we don't make a choice, then we'll both die. And the killing won't end," He made brief eye contact with Lexa. "There's only one way out of this," Marcus rose to his feet, the knife clutched in his right hand.

Anya shifted slightly to see the men, crouching low into a fighting position.

Marcus then offered the knife to the other, instructing him to kill him. "You have to do this. It's our only choice." The man refused. "They respect strength. Let's show them ours." Again, Thelonious refused. They spoke of a massacre, but not the one of Lexa's people. Lexa shifted against the wall, prepared to fight. They continued to argue; one understanding the sacrifice that must be made in the name of peace, the other holding fast to his foolish notions.

Marcus stepped back a few steps before slashing the knife across his wrist. The other was quick to drop him to the ground and clutch at his companion's wound. "Come on. Help us, please. Please," he begged of Lexa. Lexa hesitated for a moment; the man, Marcus, had understood what was needed and he had shown true strength. She would not waste strength. Lexa handed the man a bandage, watching the proceedings cautiously.

She did not trust Thelonious. And she was right not to as he lunged at her with the knife. Even as he lay bleeding on the ground, Marcus called out, "Thelonious, no."

Thelonious held the knife firmly to Lexa's throat, but his form was sloppy and his grip weak. "I choose to live," he declared.

Lexa met Anya's gaze and Anya nodded curtly before ducking back behind the wall silently. Moments later, Gustus, Anya and the extra guards entered the cell.

"Take off these chains." Thelonious demanded, shifting his feet uneasily.

"Thelonious, please. She's just an innocent girl." Marcus pleaded, now on his feet. Anya felt something deep inside her protest the description as there was only a narrow sliver of Lexa's life that had been innocent.

Lexa barked out, " _Em don sad kiln._ _Dison laik ain_." Lexa swung up into Thelonious, knocking him to the side and yanking the knife from his hand. The older man soon found himself on the ground with Lexa above him, knife in hand. Lexa stood, shedding her hair covering. " _Ai don sen in chit bilaik ai gaf sen in._ "

" _Sha, Heda_." The Trikru warriors said in unison. Anya took back her knife from Lexa as Gustus replaced her shoulder guard.

"You're the commander?" Marcus asked.

"I have learned much about you. It's clear your intentions are honorable. Your desire for peace is true. _Breik em au._ Later we will talk. In the meantime, your friend will be used to send a message." At her words, the guards surged forward, kicking Thelonious in the chest and face. Marcus tried to fight against his guard, but it was useless. Once Thelonious was unconscious, he was dragged away. "The massacre must be answered." Lexa declared, her voice strong. "Blood must have blood." Marcus stared at her, a mixture of horror and respect filling his eyes.

Lexa turned away, Anya and Gustus both following her out of the holding cell.

" _Heda, what is your message to the Skaikru?_ " Anya asked.

Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose before saying, " _Leave or die. They have two days._ "

" _What of an alliance with the Skaikru?_ " Anya said as they entered Lexa's tent.

Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose before saying, " _I wish to meet with this Klark. I will discuss an alliance with her. And only her._ "

" _You will meet with her yourself?_ "

Lexa paused for a moment before nodding. " _Yes, in a way. I wish to meet with her. I will send a message with Thelonious that you will meet with her. It does not seem that the rest of their leaders understand. You saw the two men in the cell. They see us as primitive._ " Lexa's hand clenched at her side.

" _I will meet with her, Heda?_ " Anya questioned, tilting her head slightly to the side.

" _Sha, Oyna. She trusts you, at least to some extent. I will ride out with you. If I believe her intentions to be good, then I will meet with her. If not, then the Skaikru will have their two days and then they will die._ "

title comes from Nikita Gill; chapter title comes from Dessa's Sound the Bells

Translations:  
Onya - Anya  
Mochof - Thank you  
Yongon - children  
Muan-de - Mount Weather  
Maunon - Mountain Men  
Heya - Hi  
Heda - Commander  
Gostos - Gustus  
Leska - Lexa  
Ripas - murderer/reaper  
Klark - Clarke  
Sha - yes  
Natrona - traitor  
Nomon - mother  
Jus drein jus duan - blood must have blood  
Em don sad kiln. - He has made his choice  
Dison laik ain - This one is mine.  
Ai don sen in chit bilaik ai gaf sen in. - I've heard what I needed to hear.  
Briek em au - Free them

I'm not entirely sure how many chapters will be in this fic. Most of it has already been plotted out. I've also started plotting out the sequel. It will be canon divergent and the sequel will most likely disregard canon season 3 to some extent.

many thanks to romnovs who has been my sounding board at all hours of the day for some very crazy tangents and what not.

~ebh


	2. our swords shatter

**chapter ii. our swords shatter against the remains of the past**

Lexa nudged her horse forward as they neared the hill Clarke and Anya had agreed upon. Lexa glanced to her left where Anya rode.

" _Heda,_ " Anya greeted with a nod.

" _Onya, you have always believed in the Coalition. And I have asked for your advice many times._ "

" _Sha._ " Lexa chose to ignore the bite in Anya's voice as she continued.

" _What are your thoughts on the Skaikru joining the coalition?_ "

Anya hesitated, her gaze focused ahead in the trees. " _I think… I think you would be a fool not to consider it. But you are right to be wary. They are as Indra said like children. Will the Coalition survive the Skaikru?_ "

Lexa nodded slowly, her hands tightening around her reins. " _The Azgeda and the Minra both have pushed for the extermination of the Skaikru. Rivakru will stand by me no matter what. As will the Dakkru. The rest are undecided._ "

" _What of the Floukru?_ "

" _Luna continues to stay away from Polis and the Coalition._ "

" _She was never the same after-_ "

" _I know, Onya_." Lexa barked, shooting her general a harsh glare, her jaw clenched tightly. " _I don't need reminding._ " The tension between them could not have been cut by even the sharpest of Lexa's swords.

Soon the hill loomed ahead of them and Anya nudged her horse forward. A small cluster of figures stood at the top, Clarke's bright hair glinting under the sun.

" _She is not alone. Are these Skaikru branwoda?_ " Lexa growled, moving forward, her eyes fixed on the small figures ahead.

Anya chuckled, the previous tension partially dissipating. " _Perhaps. They don't follow orders well._ " Lexa let out a huff of air as Anya said, " _Shall we, Heda?_ "

" _Sha,_ " Lexa nodded slowly, her fingers tapping along the saddle, itching for her swords. Anya snapped her reins, leading the way up the hill.

At the sound of their approach, the Sky People turned sharply, weapons pointed at the two women. Clarke took a step forward, holding her hands up cautiously. The woman behind her tried to follow her but Clarke waved her off.

"Anya, it's good to see you again."

"You were told to come alone." Anya replied, staring down at the blonde.

The older woman took a step forward again, her eyes flashing. "You didn't come alone. How can we trust you?"

Lexa stared down the older woman, her hands itching to grasp the sword strapped to her back. Clarke gestured for her mother to take a step back before saying, "Anya, what is the meaning of the Commander's message: leave or die? What happened to an alliance? To getting our people out of Mount Weather?"

Anya's horse bucked a bit beneath her, shifting uneasily. "That was before one of your people fired upon one of our villages. The Commander doesn't know if she can trust you."

"Please, you have to understand. That was just one person. He was looking for me." Clarke took another step forward, craning her head to look at Anya.

"This is the second time the Commander has offered you peace and you have responded with violence," Anya said coldly. "Why should my Commander trust you, Clarke of the Sky People?"

"Because we have a common enemy. We both want our people out of Mount Weather. But we can't do that without the other." Anya and Lexa shared a look, doubt on both of their faces. "You need our technology. You won't be able to breach the Mountain without it."

Lexa shook her head subtly and Anya said, "Your numbers are small. We do not need you or your technology." Anya began to turn her horse when Clarke called after them.

"I'm the only one who knows what Mount Weather looks like. I'm the only one to escape. You do need our technology. It's the only way to free your people."

" _I will meet with her. She is right._ " Lexa said, her lip curled in distaste, " _I will meet with her an hour before the sun sets. She will come alone._ "

Anya nodded sharply, twisting to face the Sky People. "The Commander will meet with you, Clarke, an hour before sunlight. Come alone." The two women gave each of their horses a kick to their flank and took off down the hill, disappearing into the greenery.

As they entered the trees, Lexa's guards rejoined them from their positions around the hill. Lexa slowed her horse to a trot, calling out to Gustus, " _Gostos, tell the sentries that Klark kom Skaikru is to be allowed into camp._ " Gustus nodded, although the grimace on his face said otherwise.

" _You are not happy about this alliance, Heda._ " Anya observed, her eyes falling on the younger woman's stiff posture.

" _The Skaikru have only brought death since they've arrived here. And while they could be critical in ending the Maunon once and for all, they could also ignite a civil war. There are rumblings in the North. Nia has started sending raiders along her southern borders. All she needs is a reason to shatter the Coalition and she will find allies. And then there is the matter of the slaughter at Tondc. The ripa must die. "_ Anya could not remember the last time she had seen Lexa look so torn. Normally, her face was impassive, a mask of authority. But then again, the Azegda queen had always managed to elicit a stronger response from Lexa.

" _Sha, Heda._ "

No more words passed between the small group as they rode back into camp. Indra met them at Lexa's tent. " _You are meeting with the Skaikru leader._ " Indra accused, trailing after Lexa as she entered.

" _Sha, I will listen to what she has to say._ "

" _And what of the ripa? I will not stand for this alliance if he lives. My people deserve blood._ " Indra slammed a hand down on the table, her eyes blazing.

" _And you will have it, Indra. One way or another._ " Lexa accepted her armor from Anya, who had silently gathered it, watching Indra carefully. Indra nodded, seemingly pacified for the moment.

" _Mochof, Heda._ " Indra nodded again towards Lexa before turning and leaving the tent.

Anya moved deftly to help Lexa strap herself into her complex armor, fingers moving out of pure muscle memory.

 _13 years previously…._

Anya wandered around Polis, one leg still dragging slightly from her attack on the Rock warriors. She had been right. It had ended the Rock Clan's invasion at that spot. Heda had personally praised her. But regardless of praise, Anya's leg still hurt. And her mentor was dead. Anya was no stranger to death, but she had always viewed Theia as an immovable figure of strength.

As she walked, Anya found herself standing outside one of the smaller, open-air training grounds. She paused for a moment before entering. She pulled out her flint and began sharpening one of her swords.

Then a small body crashed into her's. A small girl with wild hair and a toothy smile stared up at her, a makeshift sword strapped to her back with a couple of pieces of rope.

" _Easy there, little one_ ," Anya chuckled as the girl scrambled back.

" _Will you teach me how to fight?_ " The girl blurted out, looking Anya straight in the eye, her jaw tight and determined.

" _How old are you?_ "

" _Fou yo. I've already started my lessons but I want to learn from the best. And you're the best, aren't you, Onya?_ " Anya couldn't help but chuckle at the young girl's earnestness.

" _Maybe in a few years, when you're taller._ " Anya returned her focus to her blade, a smile in the corner of her mouth. " _You better head back home._ "

" _How old are you?_ "

Anya let out a heavy sigh, " _Older than you_."

" _That's not a number._ "

" _You're pretty clever. What's your name?_ "

" _Alexandria_."

" _Bit of a mouthful._ " Anya squatted down to the little girl's level.

Alexandria nodded, scrunching her face up. " _I know. That's why I go by Leksa. Sounds better, dontcha think? Now will you teach me how to fight? I wanna be a warrior._ " The girl bared her teeth in what she probably thought was an intimidating snarl.

" _Hmmm, I think that you could make a very good warrior, little wolf. Once you're taller, that is._ " Anya ruffled Lexa's wild curls playfully.

Lexa's face split into a toothy smile at this. " _You really think so_?"

" _Perhaps,_ " Anya teased, standing back up. " _Work on getting taller and then I'll teach you how to fight._ " Anya began to walk away, back into the crowds of Polis. But Lexa followed after her, still talking.

" _Can't you teach me, Onya? My parents were warriors, so I'm already kinda a warrior._ " Anya stopped again, crouching down. " _Please, I promise I'll be good._ "

" _Fine, Leksa. The first rule is you don't argue with what I say. And that means when I say you are not ready to be a second, you have to listen to me._ " Lexa pouted but nodded eagerly all the same. " _Come and find me when you're a little older and perhaps I will take you as my second._ " Anya gave Lexa's shoulder a squeeze as she rose to her feet. The little girl stared up at her, eyes wide with awe. Anya couldn't help but wonder if that's how she looked as a child.

As Lexa darted back into the crowds, Anya watched. The curly haired girl ran up one of the stands, a bright grin illuminating her face. A tall man returned her grin. Another little girl appeared from behind the stands, holding an apple out shyly. Lexa's cheeks turned bright red and she glanced away.

Anya bit back a laugh at the tenacious girl's sudden shyness. Lexa accepted the apple and then leaned into whisper something to the other girl. Anya adjusted the sword at her waist.

This was why she was fighting. She fought so that children like Lexa could smile for longer.

" _Klark kom Skaikru approaches._ " Anya said as she entered the tent. Lexa sat on the edge of her throne, finishing her war paint. " _There has been reports of movement around their camp as if they are preparing to leave_."

" _They would be so quick to abandon their children? Or do they not trust in their leaders?_ " Anya shrugged in response, leaning against one of the posts.

" _Heda,_ " Indra greeted, " _The Skaikru leader is near_."

" _So I've heard._ "

" _I do not trust them, Heda. They hide behind their walls with their guns. They have no honor._ " Lexa rose to her feet, moving first to put away her paint and then to face Indra.

" _Then I ask that you trust me, Indra, as you have done on countless occasions. I will do whatever is best for my people. We have lived in fear of the Maunon for far too long. And if the Skaikru will help us bring it down, then we will ally ourselves with them._ " Indra's jaw clenched, but she said no more. " _Gostos, please greet our visitor_." A small smile danced across Lexa's lips as she settled back in her throne.

Anya moved to take her place at Lexa's right while Indra stood at her left, anger rolling off the older woman in waves. Lexa slouched down in her throne, playing with one of her knives.

Years ago, Anya would've scolded Lexa for not paying attention and seeming disrespectful. But it was all part of a carefully crafted act to intimidate. The act was one Lexa had perfected, down to the elegant way she slouched in her throne.

Clarke walked in slowly, apprehension seeping out of her every movement, Gustus close behind. Her eyes darted between Lexa and Indra before resting on Anya. She nodded slightly in Anya's direction, but the other woman made no motion to recognize her.

"You're the one who burned 300 of my warriors alive." Lexa stated plainly.

"You're the one who sent them there to kill us." Clarke stared back at Lexa as if to challenge her. Anya glanced momentarily to Lexa, impressed by the blonde's tenacity. A flash of recognition darted across

"Anya tells me you want peace. But then one of your people attacked one of my villages. Tell me, Clarke of the Sky People, why should I ally myself with you?" Lexa punctuated her statement by stabbing her knife into the armrest of her throne, relishing in the slight flinch it elicited from the blonde.

Clarke hesitated and Indra hissed to Lexa to allow her to kill the Skaikru girl. Lexa held up a hand, her focus still on Clarke.

"I can help you beat the Mountain Men."

"Go on,"

"There are hundreds of your people held within the Mountain. My people are as well. Together, we can free them." Clarke took a step forward, her blue eyes flashing.

Lexa shifted, dropping her knife into her lap. "Your numbers are small and your people know nothing of survival. You have yet to offer me something of worth, Clarke of the Sky People."

"I have two things I can offer you." Lexa lazily waved a hand towards Clarke for her to continue. "One, I'm the only one who's ever escaped Mount Weather."

Anya scoffed, "You would've been dead before you breathed clean air without me."

"And you would still be in a cage if it weren't for me." Clarke retorted, shifting her gaze to Anya. The two blondes' eyes locked in a stare-off, neither one willing to back off. Finally, after a few moments, Clarke tore her gaze away from Anya, focusing back on Lexa. "I know how to get into Mount Weather. There is not anybody else who can say that."

"And your second offer?"

"The Mountain Men are turning your people into Reapers." Lexa did not have to turn around to see her mentor's body tense like a bowstring. She could practically feel the tension in Anya's body. Part of her wanted to turn around, but she stopped herself. "I can turn them back."

"Impossible," Indra growled, " _Teik ai frag em op_."

Lexa ignored her and Clarke continued, "I've done it with Lincoln."

"That traitor is the reason my village was slaughtered by your people." Indra stepped up to Clarke, her hand flexed around her blade.

"Indra," Anya's voice cut through the tension, but Indra ignored her.

It was not until Lexa barked, " _Em pleni_!" that Indra stepped away. Anya moved slightly forward to watch the other general. Lexa finally stood and moved to stand in front of Clarke, Gustus close behind. Anya moved so she too stood near. "You say you can turn Reapers back into men?"

"Yes."

"Then prove it. Show me Lincoln."

Clarke nodded again, her throat bobbing nervously. "Of course. He's at our first camp."

Lexa stepped back and motioned for Clarke to lead the way. Gustus and the rest of Lexa's guard fell into step behind Clarke. Indra glared at the blonde girl's head as Lexa left the tent.

"Come, Indra."

"Don't tell me you've gone soft for the Skaikru, Anya," snarled Indra before following after the rest.

Anya hurried after the rest, ignoring the residual pain in her ribs. Anya fell into step with Clarke, her curiosity getting the better of her. "I'm glad you made it back okay, Anya. Thank you for helping arrange this meeting." Anya nodded, but remained silent, aware of the eyes on her. "How is your arm?"

"It is fine." Anya replied shortly, mindful of the tension that surrounded the group.

" _What happened to your arm, Onya?_ " Lexa asked in mild interest, her voice subtly giving away her concern, " _I thought you had seen a healer._ "

" _The Maunon placed a tracker in my arm. We did not have time to stop. I used my teeth. It is fine, Heda._ " Clarke glanced between the two women nervously, not understanding a single word. Lexa let out a low chuckle, barely more than a breath. Clarke nearly tripped over yet another tree root, but Anya caught her arm, holding her steady.

"Thanks," Anya nodded curtly, electing to ignore the heated stare she was receiving from Indra.

Clarke watched Lexa out of the corner of her eye as they travelled through the forest. There was something familiar about the other leader, but Clarke clearly could not put her finger on it.

Gustus leaned down to Lexa, muttering something darkly in her ear. Lexa's mouth dipped temporarily into a frown while she whispered back. Clarke gulped nervously, praying desperately that her mother had managed to keep Lincoln alive.

Lexa motioned to Anya to join her, and the lighter haired woman was quick to oblige, " _Chit, Heda?_ "

" _We were just discussing how the Skaikru will be received by the Coalition._ _If they truly can cure the Ripas, then many of the other clans will be receptive. They all wish for Muan-de to fall, but they do not trust the Skaikru. However, many will consent to the alliance._ "

Anya nodded along with Lexa before saying, " _And those who don't?_ "

" _The Ice Nation has been the most vocal against the Skaikru. I have been in meetings with their ambassador since the Skaikru landed. It seems that their kwin thinks the Skaikru will join with the Maunon._ " Lexa's tone was clipped, as it always had been in relation to the Ice Nation.

Anya scoffed, " _And what does Nia suggest?_ " The leader of the Ice Nation had yet to come to Polis for fear of retribution, if not from Lexa, then from Anya, or countless others. But she was always quick to offer solutions to her ambassadors.

" _The extermination of the Skaikru._ " Gustus supplied, his eyes fixed on Clarke's back. 

They walked in silence for another mile or so, the only sounds the crunch of the earth beneath Clarke's boots and the rustle of the wind. Indra bit out a harsh comment about the noise the blonde was generating, but Lexa hushed her quickly.

Gustus had shifted up towards the front, his hand resting casually on his sword as he walked behind Clarke.

" _Would Nia risk open war over the Skaikru? Her people have suffered at the hands of the Maunon as well. Her forces edge closer and closer to our borders. And if Keena sides with the Ice Nation, the Plains Clan will be exposed dangerously to an attack."_ Lexa said, although it seemed as if she were musing to herself.

Anya hesitated before answering, keeping her voice low, " _I do not know what to tell you, Heda. I have not been in Polis or at any High Council meetings in over a year_." The words fell heavily between the two, serving as a barrier. Lexa's eyes flashed with some indescribable while Anya tightened her jaw.

Neither woman spoke again until they reached the edge of the clearing that the 100 had made their home. The air still smelled of fire and ash, while the ground was charred with the bones of their people. A sense of rage and anger filled Lexa, flooding through her senses. Her fury briefly flashed across her face before it was replaced by her façade of command. Lexa schooled her features into a mask of indifference as she walked over the remains of 300 of her warriors.

"This way," Clarke motioned awkwardly towards the hulking metal structure at the center of the compound. Lexa entered after Clarke, her hand seemingly permanently attached to the hilt of her sword. Recalling the last time she had been in this structure, Anya followed, eyes never stopping. "He's up here."

Clarke climbed up the ladder, her jaw clenched in determination. She hauled herself up quickly.

A dark haired girl was kneeling over Lincoln's prone body, hurriedly compressing his chest. Tears streaked through the dirt on her face as she screamed.

Clarke scrambled out of the hole to make way for the others. Lexa and her guards came through.

It took only a moment for the Commander and her guards to draw their weapons. Anya glanced down to the Sky Girl crouched over Lincoln and then back to the other Sky People.

"I'll kill them all." Indra hissed, gesturing her sword at the surrounding Sky People.

Lexa turned to Clarke who looked stricken, "You lied." Anya took a half a step forward, one of her swords already drawn. As much as she wanted peace, deceit could not be taken lightly; and she would follow her Commander's orders. "Is this how you would ask for peace?"

"Please, we can still work this out." Clarke threw her hands up defensively, her eyes darting around to the weapons held on both sides.

The room was filled with a sound like lightning as the older woman hit Lincoln's chest with a stick. Lincoln's body jumped limply. Indra was still calling for blood when Clarke yelled, "Hit him again!"

Lincoln's body jerked again and then he gasped. Anya stared unabashedly at her former healer as the dark haired Sky Girl clutched at his face.

Lexa took a half step back, her eyes wide. Her eyes met Clarke's and the two shared an imperceptible nod. Weapons were lowered in an instant. The air was tense as Lincoln coughed a few times.

Indra led the way out of the ship. She still gripped her sword tightly and her shoulders remained drawn up high. Anya followed closely behind. She wouldn't put it past Indra to make a move against the Sky People in revenge for her people. But they could not have that.

Lexa joined them outside the dropship, her expression grim as she looked over the ashes of her people.

" _We will have peace with the Skaikru._ " Lexa declared, her words in contrast with the anger in her eyes.

Indra crouched down to examine the remnants of a sword, a charred piece of metal warped nearly beyond recognition. " _And what of the ripa? I will not allow for them to walk freely in these woods without the ripa's life._ "

" _Remember your place, Indra,_ " Lexa snapped, " _Indra, the ripa will die before the alliance is made_." Lexa took a step towards Indra, her arm extended. " _You will have blood._ "

" _Heda, Naikao has information about the ripa._ " Gustus gestured to the healer who stepped forward, bowing his head slightly to Lexa.

" _Speak_." Lexa commanded, glancing past Nyko for any Sky People.

Nyko shifted his supply bag before speaking lowly, " _The ripa, he is the one called Fin. I watched as he gunned down our people._ " The dark haired boy who had been quick to point his weapon at them appeared in the entrance. His face had an unfriendly set to it, a warrior's face.

" _Mochof, Naikao_." Lexa said quickly, mindful of the Sky People gathering in the doorway.

Clarke was the first to approach, "My mother," Clarke motioned to the older woman behind her, "wants to take Lincoln back to our camp to monitor his healing process."

"Very well. We may now discuss the terms of our alliance." Clarke nodded before turning back to her people. " _Gostos, Onya,_ " the two quickly joined Lexa, " _We will have our alliance, but only after the ripa dies._ " She made eye contact with Indra, " _He will suffer the pain of 18 deaths. Gostos, when we return to camp, reach out to the other clans and let them know. We will march on Muan-de soon with the Skaikru at our side._ "

" _Sha, Heda. I shall send riders to Polis immediately. The River Clan's small group of warriors should arrive at camp shortly_." Gustus began walking back into the trees as he spoke.

When she crossed the threshold, Lexa froze and turned back, and said, " _Yu gonplei ste oden._ " Her eyes raked over the ashes of 300 of her strongest warriors, and a pain filled her heart. Anya patted her shoulder as she passed her.

" _Come, Leksa. The dead are gone; the living are hungry_."

not entirely happy with it, but ah well. we will start to get into more action soon enough.

translations:

Azgeda - Ice Nation  
Floukru - Boat People  
branwoda - fools  
Fou yo - four years old  
Teik ai frag em op - let me kill her  
Em pleni - enough  
Yu gonplei ste oden - your fight is over

just for reference: there is about a 10/11 year difference between anya and lexa. so anya is 29 and lexa is 19.  
next chapter will be up before next thursday most likely.  
~ebh


	3. at the first splinters

**chapter iii. at the first splinters, you run to tell geppetto**

"…Deliver me the one you call Finn. Our truce begins… with his death." Clarke jerked back slightly and Lexa couldn't help but feel for this girl in front of her.

"His death? No, I will not hand him to you." Lexa had to admire her strength, even surrounded by those who had been her enemies only hours earlier.

There was a low growl behind Lexa, "He slaughtered my people. I will slit his throat myself." Indra slammed a hand down on the table, a knife at the ready. Clarke flinched slightly at the abrupt sound, but remained silent. "Jus drein jus duan." Indra spat.

Confusion clouded Clarke's eyes at the words.

"Blood must have blood," Anya spoke up from behind Indra, her tone dry.

"You have until nightfall tomorrow, Clarke of the Sky People. Deliver me the murderer and we will discuss the details of our alliance. Anya, ensure that Clarke returns to her people unharmed."

Anya nodded sharply, "Come Clarke, I will escort you back to your camp." As Clarke stood, Indra glared at her, gripping her knife threateningly.

" _Onya, send two men with her. They will stay at the Skaikru camp until the ripa is delivered. And then bring me the Skaikru man_." Lexa ordered as Anya guided Clarke out of the tent. Anya ducked her head slightly towards her Commander before leaving the tent.

" _I will kill all of them._ " Indra's voice leaked out of the tent, rage fueling her, " _I will burn th-_ "

" _Enough. Begin the preparations for the ripa's execution._ "

Anya let out a short sigh as Clarke glanced back towards the tent. Whispers and eyes followed them as they walked through the camp. Clarke, to her credit, held her chin up and ignored the looks that followed them.

"Two guards will escort you back. They will wait for the ripa."

"We will not just hand Finn over to be killed. That's not justice." Clarke spat out, striding confidently alongside Anya.

Anya stopped, catching Clarke's arm, "He killed 18 innocents. He is a ripa. This is justice." Clarke turned away, a hiss of annoyance leaving her. "Clarke, you say you want peace, yes?" Clarke nodded, "If you do not hand over this ripa, the Commander will have no choice but to declare war on your people."

"But we've agreed to an alliance against the Mountain Men."

Anya fought back an eye roll at the naivety of the Sky girl, "Clarke, what that ripa did is an act of war. If Heda does not end the ripa's life, she will be seen as weak."

"Anya, you want peace just as much as I do. I know you do." Clarke argued, grasping Anya's arm.

"No, Clarke. You are wrong. I want justice for those who died at that boy's hand. He must pay for his crimes. Blood must have blood." Anya turned away as they reached the edge of the encampment. " _You two,_ " she barked, " _you will escort Klark back to their camp. You will wait there until the ripa is given to you or the Skaikru send a message. This is Heda's command. Go._ "

" _Sha, Strata Onya_." One of the men replied, moving to mount his horse. His companion handed him a lit torch before mounting his own. The flames cut through the fog that was beginning to settle amongst the hills. The first man gestured for Clarke to walk. Clarke hesitated, looking back at Anya.

"Anya, may we meet again." Clarke reached out an arm towards the other blonde. Anya considered it for a moment before grasping it.

As Clarke and the two guards disappeared into the mists, Anya couldn't help but feel as if the peace was short-lived.

 _12 years ago…_

" _You're the pauna!_ " Lexa called, backpedalling away from the older boy as he lunged at her. The other children screamed with laughter, all running in circles.

Lexa spun away, her braids whipping after her moments later. Dust surrounded her heels as she ran away. There was another shout declaring who was pauna now and Lexa twisted to look over her shoulder.

Her shoulder collided with something hard and Lexa found herself on the ground.

" _Hey! Watch where you're going!_ " a high voice cried from the ground next to Lexa. Lexa rolled over onto her belly to look at the person she had run into.

The other girl had hair like fire and eyes like the earth. Lexa stared at her, her mouth slightly agape. The other girl reached out a hand to help Lexa up. Lexa could've sworn that there was a spark between their fingers.

Lexa's cheeks and ears flamed red as she stood to her feet, suddenly aware of all the dirt that covered her limbs.

" _I'm so sorry about that!_ " Lexa babbled, hastily brushing dirt off herself. " _Are you okay?_ "

" _Sha._ " The other girl glanced briefly at her elbows, where a bit of skin had peeled off. " _I'm Kostia_. _What's your name?_ "

" _I'm Leksa._ "

"Come with me." Anya said brusquely, crossing her arms firmly over her chest. Marcus of the Sky People looked up from the map he was studying in surprise. "The Commander would like to speak with you."

"Of course. Has an alliance been agreed upon?" Marcus asked, standing to his feet.

"The Commander will explain." Anya motioned to the tent flap behind her. Marcus quickly exited and Anya walked half a step behind him. Gustus greeted them at the entrance to the Commander's tent. The three walked in, Anya and Gustus nodding in greeting while Marcus said, "It is good to see you again, Commander."

"Sit," Lexa said with a lazy wave towards the table. Marcus quickly sat, his eyes fixed on Lexa as he did so.

"Has an agreement been made with my people?"

"All they must do is hand over the boy who slaughtered my people, Finn, and we will stand together against the Mountain. If they do not, we will declare war on them. The wrath of the 12 Clans will fall upon your people, and tell me, Marcus of the Sky People, can your people survive a war on the ground?"

Marcus's brow creased with concern, "And what of peace?"

"What of justice?" Lexa countered, joining Marcus at the table. "What of the families that were torn apart by the bullets of this boy's gun?"

The tent filled with tension as Marcus spoke again, "I'm sorry for your loss. We were no stranger to death in the last days of the Ark. Please know, Commander, that I do not support what Finn did. But he is just a boy. If he is given to you, what is his fate?"

"He will suffer the pain of the deaths of 18 innocents." Anya supplied from behind Lexa, "This is our way. First he will burn. Then his hands, his tongue and his eyes will be removed," Lexa stood to her feet, a look of pain flashing across her eyes, "Those who grieve will then be given a chance to cut him. If he survives till then,"

"I will end it with my sword." Lexa said, turning back to face the others, "This is our way. Once he is dead, the Sky People will join the Coalition."

"The coalition?"

"Yes, the Commander has united the 12 Clans of this land." Anya said, tugging a map towards them. She gestured to the lands outlined on the map. Marcus looked on with wonder as Anya outlined the lands of the 12 Clans. "They all recognize the Commander as their leader. Many of them will soon be here with their own warriors."

"Fascinating. On the Ark, for many years all of the stations were separated until it was decided that together the stations would be better."

"How many of your people are there?"

After speaking through the night, Lexa released Marcus Kane back to his people.

" _Heda, the messengers have returned_." Gustus announced.

" _With the ripa_?" Lexa asked, looking up from the map she was studying.

" _No, the Sky People say they will fight rather than give up the boy._ "

Lexa let out a hiss of irritation before walking into the entrance of her tent to overlook her warriors spread throughout the camp. " _They are fools_ ," Anya added, " _They will be slaughtered. And for what? One boy_."

" _If they want war, then they shall have it_."

Indra stood in front of Lexa, her sword drawn, " _Heda, is it true that the Sky People refused to hand over the ripa? I will not stand for this_."

" _Indra, you will get blood. If the Sky People refuse to hand over the boy, we will destroy them. Jus drein jus duan_." Lexa's last words came out as a yell, her eyes falling on the warriors around her.

Indra quickly took up the chant, " _Jus drein jus duan_." Soon the entire camp was chanting, the words echoing eerily around the valley. Lexa glanced up to the Sky People's camp. She could see them milling about the edge of their camp, weapons in hand.

" _I want scouts watching the woods surrounding the Sky People. If they try to move the ripa, I want to know_."

" _Sha, Heda_." Gustus barked out a few orders as he walked away, gathering warriors.

" _Onya, you will take a small force if the ripa tries to run._ " Lexa directed as she reentered her tent, Anya trailing behind her.

Anya meant to bite her tongue, but familiarity overruled common sense as she bit out, " _Are you sure, Heda_? _You took away my command last time we fought against the Sky People. Are you sure you trust my judgment?_ "

Lexa turned to face her sharply, eyes flashing, " _Hold your tongue, Onya._ "

" _What are you going to ignore me again, Heda? Or remove me from my command again?_ " Anya sneered, her emotions bubbling forth. The two women faced off, Lexa desperately trying to hold her mask in place while Anya glared harshly at her former second.

" _Onya, enough. You were not finishing off the Sky People so I sent Tristan. I believed he would fair better against them. It was not personal._ " Lexa finally said coolly, but Anya could see the fire burning deep within the recesses of Lexa's eyes.

Anya took a step towards Lexa. " _It's always been personal, Lexa_." Lexa's eyes pleaded with Anya to stop. When Anya looked into Lexa's eyes, all she could see was the little girl who had begged Anya to teach her how to fight and who had hid in trees when her responsibilities became too much. She struggled to see the hardened Commander who appeared heartless. " _Fine, if you want me to take a force to apprehend the ripa, I will. As you wish, Heda_." Anya snarled, leaving Lexa standing there, looking more vulnerable than she remembered.

As soon as Anya exited, Lexa's shoulders slumped forward. Emotions threatened to overwhelm her, but Lexa pushed them back. The look of betrayal in Anya's eyes lingered in Lexa's mind and Lexa wanted to scream at herself for putting that there. But she did not have time for this. She had a war to prepare for.

Letting a short breath of air out, Lexa rejoined her warriors outside, many of whom were still chanting. Anya was nowhere to be seen, neither was Gustus.

" _Look at the Sky People_ ," Indra said sharply, breaking Lexa from her thoughts, " _they are like children. They do not recognize a losing fight when they see one. That is a lesson they will learn fast now that they are on the ground._ "

" _Yes, it took Onya years to rid me of the belief that the only fights lost were the ones you avoided_."

Indra chuckled, " _You were a headstrong child. Still are._ "

 _9 years earlier…._

Anya woke with a start, her hand seeking out her sword instantly. She sat up abruptly, glancing around for what might have woken her up. Her eyes fell onto Lexa's cot – it was empty. She reached for her other sword to place it back in it's sheath over her back, but found it to be missing.

" _Jok._ " Anya muttered as she tugged her boots on. The sun was just beginning to emerge from behind the trees and a light frost made the grass crunch beneath her feet.

She crouched down to look for any sign of her second. This girl would be the death of her, she thought bitterly as she walked through the forest.

Anya picked up a small pouch that she knew to be Lexa's, half filled with dried fruit. " _Honestly._ "

She continued walking, mindful of any tracks Lexa left. Then she stumbled upon a very familiar sword on the ground.

" _Onya!_ " Anya's head shot up. There was Lexa, dangling from a tree, her face slowly turning purple.

" _Morning, little wolf. What are you doing up there?"_

" _I heard a wild boar outside our tent so I went to kill it and I chased it through the woods and then this happened._ "

" _And you didn't wake me up because…?"_

" _I can do it by myself!_ " Anya chuckled at the upside down pout on Lexa's face.

" _Oh really?_ " Anya called up, " _And it has nothing to do with a certain girl we saw last night? You weren't trying to impress anybody_?" Lexa shook her head ferociously, although she looked like she was going to throw up afterwards. " _Well, I'll just wait for you down here._ "

" _Onya,_ " Lexa whined, " _the rope is right there. Can't you cut it and let me down?_ "

" _No, maybe you'll learn not to run off on your own without thinking._ " Anya settled down in the roots of one of the trees, eating Lexa's leftover fruit. " _And thank you for the snack, little wolf_."

" _Hey! That's mine!"_ Lexa yelled, her voice warbled by the blood rushing to her face. She tried to throw her body up enough to catch the rope, much to Anya's amusement.

" _Come and get it!_ " Anya let out a chuckle. " _You know, Leksa, I could go and get that girl you were grinning after last night. I'm sure she'd be willing to help you._ "

Anya didn't think Lexa's face could look any funnier with her face twisted in focus and slowly turning purple, but she was wrong. Lexa was lucky she was already tied to the tree because Anya was fairly certain she would've fallen out of the tree at Anya's comment.

" _You wouldn't dare!_ "

" _Oh I'm sure I could go and find Luna and she could direct me to her sister._ " Lexa let out a grunt as she managed to catch the rope with one hand. " _What's her name? Clare? Cam? Ah, I know Kostia. Guess how I know that, little wolf? You were talking about her in your sleep._ " Anya supplied gleefully, watching as Lexa contorted her body in an effort to grab her knife. Lexa's cheeks burned red.

Lexa swung herself towards the other rope in an attempt to cut it. She missed by about five feet.

" _Nice one, little wolf_."

Lexa practically growled at her mentor. She waited for herself to stop swinging before taking careful aim with her knife. As soon as the knife sliced through the rope keeping her suspended, Lexa plummeted towards earth, hitting the ground with a thud. She let out a grunt of pain as she stood to her feet, brushing dirt off herself. The color of her face slowly returned to normal as Anya stood up.

Anya ruffled her hair, " _I knew you would figure it out. Now about you taking my sword…._ "

" _Go get water from the river for the whole camp?_ " Lexa asked with a wince, thinking of how many delegates there were from the Boat Clan in addition to her own people.

 _"I was going to say you're cleaning my armor for the next year, but you can also go and get the water. Maybe Kostia can help you._ "

Lexa let out a groan, suddenly wishing she was back in the tree.

Anya stood in front of the rickety walls of the Sky People's original site, her lungs filling with the ashes of her warriors. Their scream echoed faintly in her ears as she turned to the 10 other warriors she had brought with her. " _I want each of you spread throughout the surrounding area. If the boy tries to leave, take him. Do not kill him. He must suffer the deaths of the eighteen he murdered_."

Echoes of " _Sha, Strata_ ," resounded through the warriors before they all melded into the forest.

Anya turned to face the gate, a grim look of determination on her features. Pulling one of her blades from their sheaths on her back, Anya approached the gate, keenly aware of the quiet that seemed to have settled once more over the forest.

"Are your people really willing to die for the sins of one boy?" Anya called out, her voice sweeping into the compound. "Ripa, give yourself up and your people will not suffer as mine did at your hand. Remain a cowardly child and your people will be eliminated. There truly are so few of you that it would be unfortunate if the might of the Twelve Clans were to fall on your heads. You may have guns, but we will not rest till the Sky People are gone from this earth."

Voices floated out over the walls along with the noisy bang of feet against metal.

"We're not giving him up!" A voice Anya was unfamiliar with yelled.

"If you do not, your people will be annihilated."

Anya drove her sword into the earth, partially for dramatic effect, partially out of pure boredom and agitation. If the Sky People did not have guns, she would have simply stormed the compound. It had numerous weak points and the Sky People were untrained in combat. But storming the compound would only result in the deaths of her people.

Anya stared ahead at the broken defense of the children. The occasional flicker of movement peaked her interest, but Anya remained firm.

"Ripa, I know you were the one who asked Lincoln for peace. Your people will have peace. But first, you must pay for your crimes. Peace is forged in blood." There was another large shift behind the defenses. Anya bit back a smile, her mask firmly in place.

There was a shout on the other side of the compound from one of her warriors, and Anya knew they had the ripa. Moments later, Mosis appeared from the trees, one hand tangled in the boy's collar. The boy's eyes were wide with fear. He did not look like a murderer. The thought only made Anya's lip curl up in a snarl. " _Tie him to my horse._ "

"Finn!" A panic shout came from the compound and soon some of the Sky People stood in the gate, weapons hanging from their shoulders. The older one pointed his at Anya, his brow set in concentration.

"Let him go, or I shoot."

Anya looked lazily at him, "You shoot me and your people will not live to see the sun rise again. The Commander has offered you a generous deal, too generous some say. You would be fools not to accept it."

Clarke's eyes were not on Anya, but on the ripa behind her, "Finn, please, we can find another way."

Finn shook his head, "There is no other way. I killed those people." The words sounded forced, sending another surge of anger through Anya's veins. This boy, this child, murdered her people and he was a coward. "It's the only way," he said again, his voice shaky.

"He sees sense," Anya mounted her horse, her eyes fixed on Clarke. A large bruise marred Clarke's head and the girl looked close to tears.

"Anya, please. You said you wanted peace."

Anya's eyes narrowed as she said, "We can have peace once we have justice, Clarke of the Sky People. Blood must have blood. The boy's execution will begin once the sun has set. Once the Commander has dealt the final blow, then she will discuss the details of the peace." Anya tugged on the reins of her horse to turn away from the Sky People. The ripa jerked behind her as Clarke let out another plea for him.

As Anya led the boy away, flanked by the others, her thoughts drifted to her last conversation with Lexa. Lexa had been crudely molded into the Commander and when Costia had been taken, it shattered the remnants of her former life. All that remained was the Commander, and Lexa hid behind that. And so Lexa had sent her away. But the pain that was so deep within the green eyes Anya knew so well seemed to have made a permanent scar since the last time Anya had been close to Lexa.

There was something so broken within her. Anya didn't know how to fix Lexa. And that terrified her. For years, Anya had been the one to bandage Lexa's cuts and bruises; she had stood by Lexa's side as she grew into her responsibilities; she had been the one to try and protect Lexa from the pain, but she had failed. She had failed so dramatically.

chapter title from Dessa's The Crow

Translations:

Strata - general - from "strategy"

pauna - gorilla

Kostia - Costia

leave a note here if you liked it! or even if you didn't! either way.

say hi on tumblr: yesheda (the 100) or jessivajones (main)

~ebh


	4. my hand is ungentle

**the lightning in their souls**

 **chapter iv. my hand is ungentle**

 _12 years earlier…._

" _Whoa there, little one_ ," Anya glanced down at the child who had crashed into her. " _Why are you following me, Leksa?_ "

The girl in question stared up at Anya with wide eyes. " _I wasn't following you, Onya. I swear._ "

Anya tugged Lexa out of the street, grinning to herself, " _Oh, really, Leksa? You've been following me since I left the blacksmith._ "

Lexa tipped her chin up defiantly, " _I was not._ "

" _You're not as sneaky as you think._ " Anya ruffled Lexa's hair playfully, " _C'mon, you can walk with me for a while. I'm meeting, uh, a friend._ " Lexa grinned up at Anya, her hand reaching up for Anya's.

" _So are you meeting a pretty girl?_ " Lexa asked, swinging her arm wildly as they walked.

" _No,_ "

" _A pretty boy?_ "

" _I wouldn't call him that_." Anya chuckled, leading Lexa through the streets. Lexa bobbed alongside her, chatting loudly.

" _What's his name?_ "

" _Romulus. Now be quiet for a bit, little one._ "

But that did nothing to deter the little girl, " _Were you off fighting the Rock Clan? I heard that there was a war with them. I heard that Heda rode out to fight their biggest warrior to end the skirmish. Did you see that? Is she the best fighter there is? Did you kill anybody? Onya, do you have any kills marks?_ "

Anya rolled her eyes again, trying to keep up with the little girl's questions. " _I have a few, little rabbit._ "

" _I'm not a rabbit._ " Lexa declared, crossing her arms firmly over her chest as she stopped suddenly.

" _No, but you talk like one. Now come along_ ," Anya tugged on the girl's hand again. Anya led Lexa to one of the small food huts, listening with one ear to Lexa's babbling.

Romulus sat in one corner, his back against the rough stone. He waved them over, setting his book down. " _Heya, Onya. Who's this?_ "

" _I'm Leksa. I'm gonna be a warrior just like Onya._ " Lexa declared, setting her hands on her hips, staring Romulus down.

" _Oh, yes. Onya's told me about you. I've heard that you're very…uh, tough._ " Lexa beamed up at Anya, pride spilling out of every pore. " _Please sit._ " He gestured to the chairs easily. Lexa clambered up, questions already spilling out or her lips.

Anya leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to Romulus' cheek as she sat.

" _Are you a warrior?_ "

" _Sha,_ " Anya answered, " _He's the best archer in the Trikru._ "

" _Just like you're the best warrior in the Trikru?_ "

Anya chuckled at that, " _I'm not the best. Heda is the best._ "

" _I'm going to be the very best._ " Lexa said, crossing her arms over her chest. " _What're you reading?_ " She leaned over to look at Romulus' book. "Great Acceptions? Excep?"

"Great Expectations. Your Gonasleng is already very good."

"Thank you." Lexa said in halting English, the words still foreign on her tongue. " _Are you Onya's houmon?_ "

The two 17 year olds' mouths both gaped for a moment before Anya said, " _No, uh, he's not, we're not…._ "

" _Okay._ " Lexa smiled at them and Anya couldn't help but feel like Lexa knew more. Lexa turned back to Romulus and began asking him a question about archery.

As her leg tensed slightly in response to her old injury, Anya rubbed at it, a bit of warmth bubbling in her chest as Romulus and Lexa chatted.

The bell near Heda's home rang seven times, signifying the time. Lexa just about shot out of her chair, " _I have to get back for dinner. Onya, will you train me?_ " She asked, as had become her custom for every time she saw Anya.

" _Go home, Leksa. Warriors need to eat their meals._ " Lexa nodded, shooting a grin at Anya. " _That wasn't a yes, little wolf._ "

" _Wasn't a no either!_ " Lexa called over her shoulder as she ran out of the building, wild hair flying out behind her.

" _You're going to take her as a sekon?_ " Romulus asked as they followed Lexa out of the building, their fingers just barely intertwined.

Anya looked out over the street, watching as traders packed up their wares and children, much like Lexa, ran off home for dinner. The sun painted everything in a glowing orange. Anya turned to face Romulus, " _I think so. She has a lot of spirit._ "

" _Not unlike you then._ " Romulus tugged her closer, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

Anya chuckled, her fingers wrapping around one of his arms. " _I suppose so. Although, I don't think I ever bothered Theia that much._ "

" _If you say so, ai niron._ "

The camp outside the Sky People's camp loomed out of the trees, smoke trailing into the clouds, and voices shouting loudly.

The call for blood still echoed, although softer than when Anya had left. She spared a glance over her shoulder. The ripa's face was drawn and full of fear. His eyes darted nervously around as they entered the edge of the camp.

People lined the narrow pathway to leer at him, shouting obscenities in both Trigedasleng and Gonasleng. One woman went so far as to throw a rock at him. It caught the boy around the cheek, leaving a gash there.

Once they reached the Commander's tent, Anya dismounted, taking the rope that held Finn with her.

Lexa emerged, her face now covered in her war paint.

" _The ripa, Heda_." Anya said, bowing her head towards Lexa. Lexa looked past her to the ripa.

" _This is the ripa_?" Lexa asked, shock coloring her voice as she examined him.

" _Sha, Heda_ ," Standing slightly off to the side, Nyko replied, his eyes fixed on the boy. "This is the coward who attacked my village." Nyko spoke in Gonasleng, so that the ripa would understand.

Indra moved to stand behind Lexa. " _Jus duan jus drein_." She then spat at his feet, her permanent scowl firmly in place.

"Fin kom Skaikru, you will suffer the pain of the 18 innocents you killed. You will begin your trial once the sun has set." Lexa said, her voice unwavering. With a nod from Lexa, two guards stepped forward to yank Finn away. " _Indra, make the preparations._ "

" _Sha, Heda_." Indra barked out before turning to gather her warriors.

" _Onya, a word?_ " Lexa asked softly, her words almost carried away by the boisterous noise of the camp. Lexa tilted her head back towards her tent. Anya followed the Commander, her hand clenching and unclenching at her side.

Within herself, Anya felt torn between her anger with Lexa's various dismissals and her deep seeded desire to protect Lexa. As she stood stiffly before Lexa, Anya stared ahead, the image of a perfect soldier.

" _What of the Skaikru? Do you think after the ripa's death they will still want the alliance? Right now I have gathered the biggest combined force of our people in recent memory. It should be used to take down the Maun-de, but I will crush the Skaikru if they will stand against us._ "

Anya dragged her eyes up to Lexa, her jaw clenched. " _I'm sure they will not be a problem._ "

" _Onya_ ," Lexa said sharply, " _You are one of my generals. I would like to hear your opinion._ "

" _The Skaikru want their people out of the Maun-de just as much as we do. Some of them at least realize that the only way for that to happen is with your army. Is that all, Heda?"_ Anya forced herself to look beyond Lexa's shoulder, unable to look into her eyes. Anya knew those green eyes would look vulnerable, Lexa's mask slipping slightly.

Lexa nodded stiffly, her face impassive. " _Sha, Onya. You may leave._ " Anya let out a grunt of assent before turning to leave.

" _Leksa_ ," Anya began as she stood in the entrance of the tent, " _It's all right to rely on those around you. If you are too proud to ask for help, you will become weak._ " Anya repeated her words from many years ago. Recognition flashed across the younger woman's face, but disappeared as quickly as it had appeared.

" _You are out of line_."

" _Very well, Heda._ "

 _12 years previously…._

" _You wish to take Leksa as your sekon?_ " The matronly woman asked, her eyes raking up and down Anya's form.

" _Sha. She has shown herself to be a proficient fighter already and I think she could benefit from some guidance._ "

" _I agree. Her parents were both warriors, and from what I hear, very skilled. But Leksa does not have any direction. She's a fast learner; already one of our best Gonasleng speakers for her age._ "

Anya nodded, a smile hinting at the corner of her mouth. The tenacious little girl would be a good second for her. " _Good. So you will allow it?_ "

" _Sha. Now you just have to find her. She's out and about somewhere. I will have her things ready when you return._ "

Anya took her leave, wandering through the streets surrounding the orphanage in search of Lexa. She had no idea where the girl could be, nor any idea where any children might be.

A group of boys sprinted past her, one clattering into her legs. He muttered an apology before continuing on. Anya followed them down another street past a row of half constructed houses.

Shouts of " _throu daun!_ " echoed up the street as Anya looked over the proceedings from a set of stairs. There was a grunt of pain and a larger boy stumbled out of the group, clutching at his nose.

There was a spin of dark hair along with a lightly colored stick and another boy, thinner than the first, dropped down.

Lexa, Anya thought, watching her soon-to-be second fight with a group of boys who had both height and experience on her. But neither seemed to faze the dark haired girl. She moved fluidly in the small space, easily dodging their blows. She hit one of them on the hand, but then another one hit her in the ribs. Lexa let out a grunt, twisting out of the boy's grip with a snarl.

The tallest boy pulled back a fist and hit Lexa's jaw, dropping her to the ground. Lexa lashed out with her stick, only catching one of them in the shin. She rolled away from the tall boy, kicking out at him.

Anya was impressed with her tenacity, but it was time to end the fight.

" _All right, you've made your point. I'm sure you're all very brave warriors for beating up one girl._ " Anya said as she stepped into the group. Two of the boys walked into each other in fear as they realized who she was.

" _She started it._ " The tallest boy said, holding up his hands.

" _And you finished it. Now run along. I need to speak with my sekon._ " Lexa had scrambled to her feet, eyes still darting around as if she was still going to fight them. At Anya's words, the boys took off running, already laughing about something else. Lexa's jaw dropped at Anya's words, staring at her with large green eyes.

" _Your sekon?_ "

" _Sha, but if you're my sekon, I expect that you stop getting into fights all the time. Only some of the time._ " Lexa nodded furiously, " _And you'll need to learn to only pick fights that you can win._ "

" _I could've won._ " Lexa demanded, limping after Anya.

" _No, you couldn't have. What happened to your ankle?_ "

" _Nothing._ " the younger girl replied quickly, although the grimace on her face gave her away.

Anya stopped, catching her new second's arm. " _Leksa, it's okay to accept help if you are hurt. If you are too proud to ask for help, then you will be making yourself weak. And weakness is not acceptable for warriors. Now I'll ask again, what happened to your ankle?_ "

" _Somebody stepped on it._ " Lexa rolled the hem of her pants up, revealing a dark bruise already forming. " _I can walk._ "

" _If you say so, little wolf._ " 

Lexa stared out over her people, watching the progress of the execution site. The warriors of Tondc worked under Indra's supervision, their faces set in a permanent scowl, their eyes occasionally darting up to the Skaikri's camp.

" _Look at them._ " Gustus' deep voice cut through her musings. " _They are weak._ " Lexa nodded, her eyes moving up to the metal walls of their camp. " _The River Clan's warriors have arrived. Onya is greeting them._ "

" _Good. The sun has almost set. When Onya and Sirgei return, the ripa will receive his sentence and we will begin._ " Lexa turned away from the Skaikru camp.

" _Heda. The preparations for the ripa's trial are complete._ " One of Indra's seconds said, his face grim.

" _Mochof. Tell Indra the trial will begin when the sun has set._ "

" _Heda Leksa,_ " a tall man stepped forward, holding his arm out for Lexa to grasp. " _It is good to see you again. The River Clan is proud to stand with you against the Maunon. I have nearly 100 warriors with me._ " Sergio cast his eyes around before taking a step closer to Lexa. " _My people are increasingly concerned about the Ice Nation. Nia's forces have been probing south. They do not wear Azdega clothing, but they speak Azdesleng. I left the majority of my forces north to protect against any attacks. When my people agreed to join your Coalition, Heda, we believed that there would be peace._ "

" _You know as well as I do that the Ice Nation has always been the most unstable of the Coalition. Their kwin_ ," Lexa's mouth pulled into a snarl, " _has very little respect for the Coalition. I will see what I can do, but if necessary, the Trikru and the Coalition will fight with you, Sirgio._ "

Sergio nodded, pacified for the moment. " _Mochof, Heda._ "

" _The ripa is ready, Heda._ " Gustus said.

Anya lingered in the doorway, her body tighter than a bowstring. Lexa's eyes flitted briefly to her mentors, but she quickly looked away, unable to form words.

The small group made their way through the camp to the ripa's holding cell. Lexa entered first, flanked by Gustus and Anya. The ripa sat, curled in on himself, in the corner. His eyes had a haunted air to them.

"Finn of the Sky People," Lexa began, her voice ringing out in the small space, "You have committed a crime of great dishonor: you attacked innocents, ending their fights too soon. For that, you will suffer the pain of their deaths, all 18 of them." Lexa nodded to her guards, who quickly yanked Finn to his feet, leading him out of the cell. Lexa followed after them, running over her official words in her head. Outside of the cell, her warriors stood at attention, their calls for blood still echoing in the camp. "I, Leksa, Heda kom Trikru, Heda kom Kongeda, sentence Fin kom Skaikru to death. He will suffer the deaths of the eighteen he killed. Those of you who lost your loved ones in his slaughter will have blood. The dead of Tondisi will have their blood. Jus drein jus duan!" Lexa raised her ceremonial sword in the air with her final words.

The call for blood continued as Finn was tied to the tree. The Sky People watched from behind their fences, fear radiating down the hill.

Lexa ducked back into her command tent across from the execution site. Anya lingered for a moment, debating whether or not she should follow. Anya chose to remain outside, a blonde figure peaking her interest. The blonde walked down through the warriors that sneered and shouted at her.

"I'm here to speak to your commander." Clarke's voice cut across the noise of the warriors, her eyes fixed on Anya. Indra stepped forward, a spear pointed at Clarke's sternum. "Let me through."

Red began to spread across Clarke's shirt as she stepped closer to Indra. Anya met her eyes, not surprised to see the anger hidden in their depths.

"Let her through." Lexa said from behind Anya. Anya's hand found its way to a knife at her waist while Clarke stepped past Indra. "You bleed for nothing. You cannot stop this." Lexa's eyes remained fixed on Clarke, her jaw set.

"No. Only you can." Clarke said. "Show my people how powerful you are. Show them you can be merciful." The tendons tightened along Lexa's neck. Anya shifted forward. She knew that there was mercy in Lexa's heart, but it had been long since tamped down. "Show them you're not a savage."

"We are what we are." Anya listened to Romulus' words from so long ago echoed back in Lexa's voice.

"Then I'm a killer. I burned 300 of your people." Anya's brow set in a frown. "I slit a man's throat and watched him die. I'm soaked in Grounder blood. Take me."

"But Finn is guilty."

"He did it for me. He did it for me."

Lexa swallowed heavily, "Then he dies for you." Memories of broken screams and broken glass flash before Anya's eyes. A box, a flash of fire like red.

"Can I say goodbye?" Clarke asked, her heart in her throat. Lexa nodded numbly.

As Clarke turned away, Anya stepped forward, reaching out for Lexa. She brushed her hand over Lexa's in the briefest of touches. Lexa glanced towards her momentarily, pushing away her weakness.

Lexa's jaw remained set, the image of a perfect warrior. Anya stood by her side, also unwilling to show her weakness. They watched as Clarke leaned into Finn's body.

" _Why did you allow her to say goodbye, Heda_?" Gustus asked stiffly.

Lexa glanced his way, " _Everybody deserves to say goodbye._ "

Clarke stumbled away from Finn's body, blood covering her chest. A look of horror crossed her face as she looked at the knife clutched in her hand.

As realization swept over the warriors, they began yelling for blood once more, but now Clarke's blood.

Lexa stepped forward, raising a hand. "It is done." Silence fell amongst the warriors. Then a scream echoed from the Skaikru camp.

Clarke's hands were coated in blood. Tears began to streak down her face. A strangled yell fell from her lips. Lexa motioned to Gustus to take Clarke to her tent. Clarke followed numbly, her mouth opening and closing in shock.

Already, a few of the Sky People were rushing down the hill towards Clarke. Lexa's eyes lingered on Finn's body, blood still trickling out.

Indra stormed over, her knuckles white around her spear. " _Blood did not have blood, Heda._ " She growled, shoulders hunched over, ready to fight. " _My people will not rest. I want the ripa to burn with the innocents he killed. They will be joined in fire._ "

" _Sha, Indra._ " Lexa rested her hand on her sword, a old nervous habit. " _The Skaikru will not be pleased._ " She sighed, looking to Anya for advice.

" _No, they won't. But anything else would be seen as weakness._ " Anya's voice shook a bit as she spoke. " _And you cannot appear weak right now, Heda._ "

Lexa closed her eyes for a moment, pain pricking at her heart. Costia's deep brown eyes seemed to float before her vision, initially filled with light and life and then staring blindly forward.

" _You're thinking about_ her _._ " Anya observed softly, touching Lexa's elbow. " _You've always had the same expression about her. Since you were young._ "

" _I'm fine, Onya._ "

" _I never said you weren't._ "

Gustus appeared in the doorway of the tent with Marcus Kane, Clarke's sobs still audible. " _There are those who still want blood, Heda._ " Gustus said. " _They want the Skaikru to suffer._ "

" _They have suffered._ " Anya replied, " _What their leader has done will stay with her always. To kill the one you love, that is the worst punishment for the living._ " Anya's voice contained only the slightest quiver, only the slightest indication of pain.

" _I must speak with them._ " Lexa's posture appeared strong, as did her voice, but her eyes betrayed her. Old wounds were exposed once more and it showed in her eyes, but only to Anya. But Anya barely recognized her second anymore.

Anya watched as Lexa spoke to Clarke, iciness in her voice. The two older Sky People protested Lexa and Indra's demand that the ripa's body be burned with the victims. Her mind was elsewhere, with someone else.

" _Onya."_ Lexa's voice snapped her out of her thoughts, " _Ready the guard. Send a rider ahead to alert the people of Tondisi. We will be there by morning._ " Anya nodded sharply, the room coming back into focus. With a glance at Lexa, Anya realized that Lexa was giving her an out.

" _Sha, Heda._ " Anya stepped out of the tent, looking out over to where a dark haired girl sobbed over the ripa's body. Clarke stepped out after her, nearly running into her. "Clarke," Anya began, her eyes searching the younger woman's face.

"What?" Clarke's words came out choked and broken.

Anya sighed softly, "You should know that you saved that ripa from his pain. What you did…there are some who are not so lucky." The laughter of two girls, still untouched by the world, filled her ears. 

_6 years earlier…_

"Show me the fourth motion." Anya commanded, leaning back against the trunk of a tree. Lexa stepped through the motions, her brow furrowed in concentration. "Again."

Lexa moved through the motions again and again.

"Again."

" _Onya, how much longer until we spar?_ "

"In Gonasleng." Anya replied curtly.

"How much longer until we spar? We've been going through practice motions for hours."

"Yes. When you get them right, then we will spar."

Lexa let out a short sigh before stepping into her next motion. Her eyes swept across the training ground, falling upon two people entering the ground. Costia grinned back at her, causing Lexa to stumble over her feet.

"That's not right." Anya commented drily. "Again." Lexa nodded sharply, her cheeks burning red.

She was half way through the steps when Costia stretched her arms up, exposing an inch of skin. Lexa fell flat on her back.

Anya let out a laugh.

"You want to spar now, little wolf?" Anya asked, leaning over Lexa as she lay on the ground. "Up you get." Lexa let out a groan, accepting Anya's hand. "Two training staffs."

Lexa shifted into a fighting stance, spinning the staffs in her palms. Anya gave her no warning, just launched at her, staffs raised. Lexa barely managed to deflect Anya's right staff, sending it clattering into her side.

Anya barked out, "Watch your footwork. One, two, three." On her last word, Anya surged forward, nimbly dodging Lexa's attempts.

Anya pressed Lexa back towards the corner where Costia stood. Lexa glanced over her shoulder towards Costia while Anya stuck a foot out to trip her. Lexa stumbled back into Costia, her eyes going wide and her cheeks flushing red.

" _Easy there, Lex._ " Costia laughed lightly, smiling down at her.

Anya held her staff to Lexa's throat, smirking slightly. " _You're dead._ " Lexa let out a groan as Costia set her back on her feet. " _Again._ "

" _Disha Skaikru ste nouseim, mou bilaik Maunon kom oso._ _Mebi na teik oso kongeda au._ " Gustus said, his voice stern.

" _The Coalition or her?_ " Anya interjected from Lexa's other side. " _You need to look beyond the short term, Gostos. The Skaikru will help us end the Maunon, end the terror that our people have suffered for so long._ "

Gustus let out a grunt of disapproval, " _You are soft on them, Onya._ " Anya bristled at the accusation, baring her teeth in a snarl. " _I think they will kill the Coalition. You are the Coalition, Heda._ "

" _Den dula yu dula en shil ai op._ " Lexa interrupted before Anya could respond. Anya and Gustus, despite their differences, shared a long-suffering look at Lexa's dismissive attitude.

Anya was in the process of re-saddling her horse when Clarke approached her tentatively. "Do you think that this truce will last?"

"The Commander wants peace. And she is willing to go to great lengths to achieve that." Anya replied after a beat. "But your people do not seem to understand that. They still view my people as a threat."

"Until a few hours ago, you were." Clarke said and Anya nodded slightly.

"And we were enemies with many of the members of the Coalition before the Commander united us. Peace must be fought for. I believe that you understand that, Clarke."

Clarke let out a shaky breath before turning away. She hesitated slightly. "Anya, you said I saved him from the pain, but the Commander said that my pain would haunt me."

"Yes."

Clarke paused again, her doubt in her eyes, "Did you lose somebody?"

"Everybody's lost somebody."

" _Strata Onya!_ " Anya gave Clarke one last look before swinging up onto her horse. Clarke stared past Anya blindly, focused on something in the trees.

"Clarke?" Anya asked, her brow creasing slightly. Her voice seemed to break Clarke out of her trance. Clarke stared up at her in surprise for a moment before turning away to join her people.

Anya fell into line beside Lexa, thoughts of the haunted look in Clarke's eyes that looked so familiar. Gustus was still railing against the Skaikru, but Lexa was no longer listening it seemed.

Many of the guards did not trust the Skaikru and it was painfully obvious. They clutched at their swords or their bows, their eyes darting towards the Skaikru guards with their guns. And the Skaikru guards returned their suspicious glares, fingers tight to their triggers.

As they approached the gates of Tondc, the Trikru dismounted.

"Weapons," Gustus grunted out, holding a crate out for the weapons. The dark haired girl with the brace who had ridden with the ripa stood staunchly in front of Gustus, her mouth pursed in a challenge. Gustus pulled a number of weapons off of her while she glared at him.

They are greeted by shouts, some of welcome, others insults to the Sky People. Anya stepped closer to Lexa, ready to protect her at a moment's notice.

A man moved to block Lexa's way, tears tracking down his face. " _Skaikru don jak etin op kom ai: ai houmon, ai yongon._ " He pleaded, his eyes filled with rage. He took another step towards Lexa. Gustus forced him to the ground, beating his face until blood spilled out.

"Anya," Clarke began, grabbing at Anya's arm, "Please stop him. They'll blame us for this, too."

Anya leaned in, muttering in Lexa's ear, " _Heda, stop Gostos. The Skaikru do not need more death on their behalf._ "

" _Teik em kik ruan._ " Lexa ordered, her voice firm, echoing through the quiet of Tondc. Lexa turned to face her people, "The Sky People march with us now. Anyone who tries to stop that will pay with their lives." Lexa's words hung in the air for a moment before the group continued on to the center of the village where a large burial pyre stood.

The Sky People stood off to the side, shifting nervously as the people of Tondc finished their pyre. When the time came for the ripa's body to be taken away, the dark haired girl let out a sob and pressed a kiss to his forehead before he was placed atop the pyre.

Flame in hand, Lexa began, " _Kru kom Tondisi. Ruan faya, oso wada kiln laudnes-de kom fotaim._ " Somebody let out a choking sob, the noise piercing through the solemn silence.

Lexa paused as she began to lower the flame, turning towards Clarke. "Clarke," She offered the flame to Clarke, who accepted it after a moment, her eyes darting nervously to the side for a moment. She lowered it onto the pyre, only a faint shake visible in her hand.

The pyre caught quickly, flames spreading across the dry wood and bodies easily. Soon the air was filled with the smell of burning wood and flesh. Lexa remained staunchly in front of the fire watching as the bodies of her people turned to ash.

" _That natrona,_ " Indra hissed, her gaze fixated on Lincoln across the fire. " _I would have his head._ "

Anya lifted her eyes to look at Lincoln, a man she had at one time considered a friend. After all, he had stitched her battle wounds up since she was young, but he was also soft hearted, always the one to try and save the dying song bird or to fight for somebody whose fight was already lost. He was also the one…no, Anya couldn't think about that. Not now, not anymore.

" _It is not worth fighting the Skaikru over._ " Anya said to Indra.

Indra scowled deeper. " _You are becoming soft for them, Onya._ "

" _So you keep saying, Indra._ "

" _Petulant child._ " Indra snapped before turning to one of her seconds to prepare the feast.

The Skaikru shifted uneasily, talking only amongst themselves, their eyes filled with mistrust. The older woman, Clarke's nomon, seemed to be among the most anxious, constantly moving her eyes. But the man, Kane, seemed to be more trusting and more open. Anya watched with interest as they discussed something quietly.

The two young leaders remained in the center, watching the pyre burn down to ash. Lexa had that set to her jaw that Anya always considered dangerous. The one she got whenever Costia was mentioned. The one that made her push those closest to her away.

Anya could not hear what words were exchanged, but she had been around Lexa long enough to know even her smallest tells. Lexa finally turned away from the fire, leaving Clarke to stare at the remains of the boy she had loved.

It had all happened so fast. One minute they were toasting the alliance, then next Gustus was on the ground and swords were drawn.

Healers hauled Gustus out of the tunnel while Indra and Anya stood between Lexa and the Skaikru, swords drawn. At Indra's command, guards surged forward to search the outsiders while Clarke pushed past.

"Please, we didn't do this." Clarke sought out Anya's gaze, but Anya only returned a glare.

"Gustus warned me about you. I didn't listen." Lexa said, coolly moving forward.

"Lexa, please."

Clarke took another step forward, fighting against the restraining arms of the guards. Anya positioned herself between the two, her sword still raised. "Tell me, Clarke," Lexa said the name like an insult, "When you plunged the knife into the boy you loved, did you not wish that it had been mine?" The young leaders stared at each other, one with eyes that had long since been shattered, the other's just beginning to show cracks. Clarke's eyes drifted over Lexa's shoulder, filling with an unknown horror.

"Heda," one of the guards held up a small vial.

"That's not mine," the angry girl with the bad knee said.

" _This was in her coat._ " He handed it to Anya, who turned it over in her palm a few times before smelling it.

" _Poison._ " Anya confirmed, handing the vial to Lexa.

Another wave of anger crashed across Lexa's face as she yelled, "No Sky Person is to leave this room," before storming out, Anya close behind.

Lexa was seething as they exited above ground. She whirled on Anya, " _You told me they were not a threat. That they needed this alliance._ "

" _They do. Whenever you make an alliance, it is a risk._ "

Lexa turned away with a snarl. " _Where is Gostos?_ " Anya watched her walk away, emotions bubbling in her chest.

 _10 years previously…_

Lexa was awakened by the sound of a large crash just outside their tent. She grabbed for her sword, still far too heavy and long in her young hands. She gave Anya a hard kick, finding her mentor to already be awake.

Anya pressed a finger to her lips then motioned for Lexa to exit the tent. Lexa slipped out silently, Anya close behind.

A group of 5 figures dressed in heavy furs and white paint loomed out of the darkness, one limping along.

Anya and Lexa's fire was just a lone glowing ember, but it had attracted their attention.

Anya motioned again to Lexa for her to slip back into the shadows in the trees. Anya stepped forward, walking into a silver of moonlight, which danced off her blonde hair. The 5 men stopped, staring for a moment before drawing their swords.

Anya held both her swords loosely, daring them to come closer. One did, running at Anya with a yell, and he found himself missing a hand courtesy of one of Anya's blades. His fellows advanced on her, each swinging a heavy broad sword. Anya proved to be too quick for any of them, plunging her sword into various extremities or exposed pieces of flesh. The quiet of the night was rent apart by their screams and moans and the delicate noise of Anya's blades against theirs.

She was in the midst of slitting one attackers throat when Lexa let out a high pitched yell. Lexa had launched herself out of the trees and onto the final man's back, forcing him away from her mentor. Lexa held her knife against his throat, her eyes darting to Anya, full of doubt. Anya nodded as the man tried to buck her off. Lexa drew her knife across his throat quickly. She jumped off his back as he fell forward, blood spurting from his throat.

Lexa stared down at her hands, marveling at the deep red that covered them. " _Yu gonplei ste oden._ " She muttered, her voice cracking a bit.

" _Leksa, mochof. You did well._ " Something akin to a sob broke its way from Lexa's mouth, much to the girl's horror. " _Hush, it's all right. Let's get that blood off your hands, all right?_ "

Anya cast a pitying look Gustus' way. He had only been trying to protect her, just as Anya would do in a heartbeat, but he would pay with his life for his devotion. He had seen Hedas rise and fall, but he seemed to hold a special place for Lexa.

She stepped forward, knife in hand, to deliver her cut. Gustus met her gaze without hesitation. " _Protect her._ _Even from herself._ " He said as Anya sliced along his already bloodied arm. His fight was nearly over. Anya nodded sharply, turning away to meet Lexa's gaze.

Gustus' breath was now coming in short puffs as he struggled to keep himself upright, blood seeping through his clothes. Lexa paused for a moment. She then stepped forward to face Gustus.

Anya's mind slipped back to an even smaller Lexa who had met the larger man's gaze unflinchingly, despite her small stature. Lexa inhaled a shaky breath, staring at Gustus.

" _Ste yuj._ " He managed, a wet sound mangling the words.

Lexa seemed to inflate slightly at his words, her chin tipping up in defiance. She drew her sword, moving seamlessly into position. Her hand did not tremble; her eyes, however, betrayed her. She hesitated for another moment before saying the words, " _Yu gonplei ste oden,_ " and plunging the blade into Gustus' heart. As she pulled the blade from his chest, her chest rose and fell in a shaky breath.

Anya entered Lexa's tent quietly. " _You summoned me?_ "

Lexa nodded, handing Anya a knife with a blazing red tip. She was dressed only in her chest strap and a pair of loose pants. It was in moments like these that Anya was struck by her youth, despite the scars and tattoos that covered her skin.

" _Leksa,_ " Anya sighed, " _you are Heda. You do not receive kill marks._ "

" _I am Heda, so I can do as I please. If you do not do it, I will fetch someone else._ " Lexa pressed the blade into Anya's palm, sweeping her hair over one shoulder to expose the neat spiral of marks.

Anya pursed her lips, but remained silent. " _Fine. The blade is not hot enough._ " As she held the blade over the fire, memories of Lexa's first kill mark flooded her thoughts.

 _10 years earlier…._

Anya held her knife over the fire, turning it slight so as to reach all sides. Lexa watched with wide green eyes, her teeth sinking into her lip nervously.

" _Take off your shirt._ " With shaky hands, Lexa removed her shirt, leaving her in just her chest wrap. " _Bite down on your shirt._ "

" _I'm fine, Onya._ "

" _Bite down on your shirt. It's your first mark._ _On the count of three,_ " Anya gripped Lexa's other thin shoulder with her free hand, " _One,_ " Lexa clenched her jaw, " _Two,_ " Anya pressed the tip of the blade into her second's shoulder, " _Three._ " Anya finished, lifting the blade away from her skin.

" _I thought you were counting to three._ "

" _The element of surprise._ " Anya replied drily, pulling a poultice and small bandage from her pack. " _You'll always remember your first kill, Leksa. That is why we receive the marks. Because the dead should always be remembered, regardless of their actions._ "

Lexa nodded, staring straight ahead, her teeth gritting against the pain.

" _On the count of three?_ " Lexa asked as she settled into a chair, Anya standing over her.

" _Sha. One, two,_ " Anya pressed the blade to the empty space beyond Lexa's other kill marks. On three, she lifted the blade away, inspecting the fresh mark. It stood out brightly against her tan skin.

" _Mochof, Onya._ " Lexa stood to her feet, and then paused.

" _Gostos' death was not your fault. He chose to poison the cup._ "

Lexa raised one skeptical eyebrow. " _It was my blade in his chest._ "

" _Sha, but it was his choice to try and stop the alliance. He left you no choice._ "

" _Victory stands on-_ "

" _the back of sacrifice. I am the one who taught you that._ " Anya reveled in the hint of a spark in Lexa's eyes at her words, but it faded quickly.

" _I think there will be much sacrifice before the Maunon fall and we have victory,_ " Lexa commented darkly, the bright flame reflecting in her pupil. 


	5. you are a battleground of fear

**the lightning in their souls**

 **chapter v. you are a battleground of fear and curiosity**

 _7 years earlier…._

" _Kostia, have you seen Leksa?_ " The redhead shook her head in the negative. Anya let out a hiss of irritation. " _She is an hour late to her lesson_."

" _Sorry, I don't know._ "

Anya stormed off, stopping to ask a few of the shopkeepers that Lexa favored. No one had seen Lexa yet that morning. She checked almost everywhere that her second could possibly be, but only one person had seen her walking towards the edge of Polis.

" _Throu duan! Throu duan!"_ A familiar chant reached Anya's ears as she made her way to the edge of the city. A small group of seconds was gathered at the end of a street, chanting loudly, jostling into each other.

Anya leaned against a house, watching as Lexa smashed a fist into a boy almost two head's taller than her. He staggered away, glaring at her. Lexa smirked back, swinging her sword up to deflect her other opponent's blade.

Lexa danced out of reach of the first boy's blade, taunting him. He let out a roar of frustration as he lunged at her. Lexa parried his blade away easily. In quick succession, Lexa slashed left and right before catching the hilt of his blade, disarming him.

His sword clattered to the ground as Lexa delivered an uppercut to his jaw. The other boy, the faintest trace of a beard on his chin, ran at Lexa, lifting his blade to deliver a blow. Lexa took the opening to hit the flat of her blade against his ribcage. She then grabbed his wrist as he swung his arm around the side. With a grace that was not found in many 12 year olds, Lexa hit his wrist, forcing him to drop his sword.

" _Anyone else?_ " She asked, her voice strong. " _Good. That's what I thought._ "

" _She is one of the strongest Nightblood we've seen._ " Anya almost flinched at the sound behind her. Titus stood behind her, also watching Lexa.

" _I'm not surprised. She has a strength of spirit I have never seen before. But she is still a child. She has not learned humility yet._ "

" _I'm sure you will cure her of that, Onya. The Old Guard believes that Leksa will be the next Heda._ "

" _Is Heda dying?_ "

" _No. When the time comes, I believe that Leksa will come out of the Conclave as the new Heda. She has proven herself to be stronger than the others and all the signs the Old Guard have seen point to her._ " Titus said, his eyes fixed on Lexa as she spoke to a younger boy. Anya nodded, watching her second, who was still all gangly limbs and baby fat.

" _Is that all, Titus?_ "

" _Heda would also like to see you. She plans on marching against the Wind Clan in the coming months. They have been kidnapping children from our villages. You will lead a portion of her army. Manu passed away from a fever two days ago. It is time that you take Theia's place, Onya._ " Anya turned to face him, realizing the implications of his words. " _You will be Heda's general. The ceremony will take place after you meet with her._ "

" _I am honored._ " Titus sent her one last small smile before nodding towards Lexa, who had noticed them. 

Lexa lifted her gaze, meeting Anya's eyes. Her jaw fell a bit, her cheeks already bright red. " _Onya I, you see,_ " Lexa stammered out, quickly making her way over to her mentor. " _Titus,_ " Lexa bowed her head in deference, the tips of her ears an alarming shade.

" _That was impressive, Leksa, if not a bit foolhardy._ " Titus observed. " _You will make a fine warrior someday. Onya, think on what we spoke on. I must be getting back to Heda._ " The younger women both nodded to him as he left. 

" _Still getting into fights, I see_." Anya ruffled Lexa's hair a bit, her mind preoccupied with what Titus had said.

" _But I won, didn't I?_ " Anya simply rolled her eyes.

" _I don't trust these Skaikru._ " Quint growled as he joined Anya in the communal mess. Anya rolled her eyes but said nothing. " _What is Heda thinking?_ "

" _I do not read her mind_."

" _Clearly. My brother's fight is over. And by those yongons' hand._ " Quint stabbed angrily into a piece of meat. He lifted his gaze to glare at Anya, who continued to ignore him. " _You led him into the fight against the Skaikru. He burned to ash._ _His death is just as much on you as it is on the Skai girl that Heda protects._ " Quint spat out.

Anya finally lifted her gaze to Quint and coldly said, " _Your brother was one of Tristan's Rangers. He was not under my command._ "

Quint's lips curled into a sneer, " _If you had dealt with the Skaikru when Heda sent you, they wouldn't have been there. You were weak, Strata._ " He spat out her title like an insult. " _You couldn't even defeat a group of branwodas that fell from the sky._ " Anya spun on him, holding her knife to his throat.

" _I would advise you to stop speaking, Quint._ " Anya whispered into his ear, her blade slowly digging into his flesh. " _You saw what happened to those who oppose this alliance. I would hate for that to happen to you._ " Her voice slowed to a drawl as she moved away from him. Quint gritted his teeth in anger.

Anya shook her head in irritation as she exited the tent. One of Lexa's guards quickly approached her, telling her that Lexa had requested her presence.

" _You asked for me?_ "

" _Sha. I'm sending Indra and her gonas to the Skai camp to train. I will need you to oversee things here while she's gone._ " Lexa moved fluidly through her tent, adding pieces to her light armor.

" _Are you sure sending Indra was the best choice?_ "

Lexa shrugged a shoulder as she worked her fingers nimbly through her hair. " _Who else would you suggest? Quint?_ "

Anya let out a short bark of laughter. " _No. He still harbors resentment about his bro's death at the first Skai camp. We just had a little discussion._ "

Lexa twisted to face her, her hands still tangled in her own hair. " _Discussion?_ "

" _Sha, he believes it is my fault that-_ " Anya paused as Lexa wrestled with her hair. " _Leksa, sit down. Let me do it._ "

" _I can call-"_

" _Sit down._ " Anya ordered and Lexa dropped into her throne with a sigh. Anya stood behind her, easily weaving her fingers through Lexa's dark hair. " _Sha, Quint is wary of the Skaikru._ "

" _He will not do anything. I will not stand for dissent against this alliance._ " Lexa growled out. Anya nodded quietly, grabbing a hair tie to finish off Lexa's braids. " _Why does he blame you?_ "

Lexa's words tugged at the anger Anya still harbored within herself. Anya tried to tamp it down, but it bubbled over the surface as it seemed to do. " _His bro was one of Tristan's Rangers. Quint believes that because I did not finish the Skai yongon, his bro died. Because you sent Tristan to replace me. Because you did not trust me._ "

" _I will not have this discussion with you again, Onya._ " Lexa snapped, standing to her feet abruptly.

" _Of course not. You refused to speak with me for a year and a half. Why should I expect any differently? You didn't even trust me enough to deal with the Skaikru._ "

" _Onya. En pleni._ " Lexa rose to her full height at eye level with Anya. Her eyes flashed with hurt momentarily before it was replaced with stoicism. " _It was not personal, as I have said before._ "

" _And just as I have said before, it is always personal. Do not blame me for what happened to her. Do not lash out at me. I tried to help and you pushed me away._ " Anya took another step into Lexa's personal space, forcing her to look her in the eye. " _You sent me away. You think you are making yourself strong but you are just making yourself weak._ "

Something in Lexa's eyes snapped and the younger woman moved into Anya. " _Do not speak to me about weakness._ " Anya met her gaze easily, unsurprised by the fire in the younger woman's eyes.

" _Fine. If you wish to behave heartless, act as if you do not feel, then I will not stand in your way._ " Anya turned away, ignoring the flash of hurt in Lexa's eyes. Lexa stood resolutely in front of her throne, the only sign that she felt anything evident in the tip of her chin. To Anya, Lexa looked so wounded and broken, but to the rest of the world she was untouchable, heartless even.

" _Onya-_ "

A sharp cough broke the moment. "Sorry, am I interrupting?" Clarke asked, her eyes bouncing between Anya and Lexa.

Lexa shook her head minutely, "No, you are not." Anya huffed out a breath of irritation, but did not question her Commander in front of Clarke. "Anya, I would like you to check on our numbers and strength. Report to me by the end of the day. That is all." The dismissal was evident to all three. Anya scowled while Clarke shifted uncomfortably.

Anya nodded brusquely, "Very well, Heda." She was half way out the door when she hesitated, " _Perhaps you are as heartless as you act._ " Lexa could barely bring herself to look at Anya, her heart aching. Clarke looked on, visibly confused. Anya ducked out of the tent, her chest tight with frustration at Lexa's inability to admit her mistakes.

 _7 years earlier…._

Anya exited the throne room, her arm now bearing the mark of general. The other generals and Heda each shook her arm, giving her words of advice. Lexa rushed to her side, eyes gleaming with excitement.

" _It is an honor to serve you, Strata Onya._ " Lexa bowed her head to Anya, who smacked her on the arm.

" _Just because I am a strata now does not mean that your training will be lighter._ "

" _Of course not, Onya._ " Lexa shoots a cheeky grin towards her mentor, " _I know if you ever start becoming soft that the world is coming to an end._ "

Romulus let out a low chuckle, squeezing Anya's hand softly. " _Now, come along, Strata Onya, I believe there is a feast in your honor. And Leksa, I believe that there are some Floudonkru here as well. Something about trade negotiations?_ " He ruffled Lexa's hair playfully as her cheeks flushed red. " _And I think your girlfriend came along._ "

Lexa's cheeks burned even redder as she rushed off. " _You shouldn't tease her so._ " Anya said, tugging Romulus after Lexa.

" _Only you are allowed to, Strata?_ "

" _Sha, she is my sekon after all._ " Anya watched fondly while Lexa approached Costia, who now had a couple inches on her, a nervous grin on her second's face. " _And one day, I believe she will be my Heda._ "

Firelight danced over their faces, people laughing merrily as they drank and feasted. Lexa and Costia sat in one corner, whispering to each other. The taller girl brushed a piece of Lexa's hair and Lexa practically fell off the bench they were sitting on. Many warriors approached Anya to congratulate her on her new title.

Indra shoved a mug of ale into her hand, " _It is good to see you again, Indra._ "

" _And you._ " The older woman walked off without much more, a scowl on her face.

" _Indra the charmer,_ " Romulus crooned in her ear, handing her a plate of food, " _I was terrified of her when I was younger. She took great pleasure in thrashing me in training. All because I borrowed her sword, once._ "

" _You're a branwoda._ "

" _I am your branwoda._ " A smile cracked over Anya's lips, lacing her fingers with Romulus's. " _And I would like to be your houmon. I think that sounds nice. Strata Onya's houmon, the legendary archer, Romulus kom Trigedakru._ "

Anya responded with a kiss, tugging him into her.

Eventually, the musicians began to put away their instruments and the ale stopped flowing. Costia and Lexa, however, were still wrapped up in each other, laughing quietly as others stumbled home. " _Kostia, hos ruan houm!_ "

" _Won sec, Nomon!_ " She cried over her shoulder, turning back to Leksa. " _We'll be staying in Polis for some time. Will you come and see me?_ " Lexa nodded eagerly, pulling Costia into a hug. Both girls pulled away with bright red cheeks and wide smiles. " _For you_ ," Costia revealed a small blue flower and tucked it behind Lexa's ear. Then Costia leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to Lexa's already flaming red cheek. " _Reshop, Leksa_."

" _Reshop, Kostia._ " Lexa whispered softly, staring after the older girl as she joined her mother and sister. Her fingers brushed over the flower tucked behind her ear, marveling at the smoothness of the petals. She wandered over to where Anya and Romulus sat, speaking softly into each other's ears.

" _Ready to go home, little wolf?_ " Anya asked, grinning at her second, who was entranced by the flower behind her ear. The couple stood slowly to their feet. Lexa let out a large yawn, leaning into Anya's side. " _How's Kostia?_ "

" _En's badas._ " Lexa replied sleepily. " _Peace is nice._ "

" _That it is, little one._ "

" _I'm not little anymore, Romulus,_ " Lexa protested even as she leaned against her mentor. " _Why must we all fight? Trigeda and Floudon get along peacefully. Why couldn't all the clans agree to stop the fighting and live in peace?_ "

" _Perhaps someday, Leksa._ " Romulus sighed, looping an arm around Lexa's thin shoulders.

Anya pinched the bridge of her nose as she left a meeting with one of her fellow generals. There had been a long discussion of whether or not Lexa was right to ally herself with the Skaikru. This discussion was becoming utterly exhausting to the general.

At this point, she would've rather spent the day with the Skaikru than deal with Lexa's idiot lieutenants. She first checked Lexa's tent, but her guard there said she was still in talks with Clarke.

Anya then stormed to the meeting place, where she was told that Lexa had left.

" _What do you mean she left?_ "

" _Klark kom Skaikru left the meeting to take a walk in the woods. Then Quint also left as did Heda._ " The guard stammered out, his eyes wide with fear at the legendary Strata Anya. " _Strata,_ " he added as an afterthought.

" _Did Heda at least have a guard with her?_ " The man nodded nervously. " _Very well._ "

" _Shall I find you when Heda returns_?"

" _Oh, you won't need to because I'm going to throttle her myself_." Anya muttered under her breath as she walked away. Lexa was absolutely going to be the death of her.

She settled down in Lexa's tent, filching Lexa's sharpening stones. The sound of the stones on her blades did much for her nerves, but her last words to Lexa still echoed in her mind. She knew that Lexa still carried wounds from Costia and that Lexa had lashed out after her death. But Lexa was all she had left and it destroyed Anya to see the young woman she had practically raised to push her away.

" _Strata, one of the Skaikru is asking after Heda and Klark kom Skaikru._ "

" _I will speak to her_." Anya followed the guard out of the tent where an irate Abby Griffin stood. "You are looking for your daughter?"

"Yes, where is she? They," she jerked a thumb towards the guards, "won't let me see her."

"That's because she's not here."

"She's not here?" Abby narrowed her eyes.

"She and the Commander both needed air. It is still light out." Anya explained, crossing her arms firmly.

Abby gaped at the other woman. "They're missing?"

"I did not say they were missing. They are in the woods. They both have guards. I am willing to send out a small search party if it is urgent that you speak with Clarke."

"They are in the woods right now?" Anya nodded as if speaking with a small child. "The woods are dangerous!"

"Our people have grown up in the woods."

"My daughter hasn't." Abby stepped forward, eyes flashing. "How could you just allow them to wander off?"

"I am not the Commander's keeper." Anya replied sharply, something churning in her gut. " _Noa, take Haiden and go find Heda and Klark._ " Anya barked, meeting Abby's gaze. "Join me for a meal." Anya offered stiffly; Abby nodded just as stiffly.

The two women watched each other as they ate, wariness in both. Anya was content to sit in silence, observing the older woman. Abby squirmed slightly under Anya's gaze, but remained quiet.

" _Strata._ " Noa appeared in the doorway, his face revealing nothing.

" _Chit_?" Anya joined him in the entrance.

"There is something you need to see." He spoke loudly enough for Abby to hear. She was up in an instant, words of accusation already on the tip of her tongue. "Follow me." He led the two women into the forest. Anya nearly flinched every time Abby's boots hit the earth. "Through here," Noa said after some time, gesturing through the trees.

The tall blonde guard that had been with Clarke lay dead on the ground, an alarming amount of blood pooled beneath her. Abby let out a low gasp, her hand grasping for her gun. Haiden stood next to the body, a grim expression on his face. "Her arm was ripped off."

"What could've done this?" Abby asked, her voice stronger than her expression suggested.

"Pauna." Haiden said, his hand resting nervously on the hilt of his sword.

"And that is?"

"Something you would not wish to encounter," Anya cut in, dropping down to get a better look. "There's a trail of blood here. Noa, return to Tondc and begin gathering a search party. I want the best trackers and hunters. I will return shortly." Noa nodded quickly before darting off towards Tondc. Anya stood abruptly, following the trampled leaves and broken branches.

Not ten feet from where the Skaikru gona lay parts of Quint's body were scattered. His face looked bruised and battered, like a pauna had attacked him. His guts spilled out onto the dead leaves, bright against the earth.

Anya's eyes swept across the area, involuntarily searching for any trace of black blood.

"They aren't here. We will return to Tondc and send out search parties." Anya declared, standing to her feet. "Haiden, gather a few to help you bring these bodies back to Tondc," she gestured to Quint and his guard's bodies.

"How could they be so irresponsible?" Abby growled, trailing after Anya. "What would possess them to wander in the woods? Honestly, Kane or I should've been here, not Clarke. She is not our leader."

"Yes, she is."

"What?" Abby spat out, hurrying to catch up with Anya.

Anya rolled her eyes as she said, "Your daughter is every bit a leader that the Commander is. I have watched Clarke and her people since they landed in our territory and Clarke is the true leader."

"No, she is not. She is a child."

"So is the Commander. And she is the most capable leader my people have known." Anya cut Abby off, gritting her teeth. "You would do well to listen to Clarke."

Abby remained silent until they reached Tondc.

As they entered the village, Anya instantly began barking orders, splitting the trackers into small groups and sending them various directions. Abby caught her arm as Anya was attempting to leave, an old bow slung over her shoulder. "Am I just supposed to wait here?"

"Yes. You Sky People make too much noise." Anya turned away before Abby could get out another word.

Her thoughts were plagued by images of Clarke and Lexa gutted on the forest floor, of Lexa's green, lifeless eyes, of the last words she said to Lexa.

 _Perhaps you are as heartless as you act._

Her own words beat against her ears as she wove her way through the trees. The sun had already dipped behind the hills, bathing the forest in darkness.

 _7 years earlier…._

Lexa stared out over the army with wonder. Warriors laughed or sang raucously as they marched or rode. The rhythm of their feet pounded in Lexa's chest as she watched. The sheer size of the army was astounding.

She had never felt so important as she did as she rode alongside Anya near the head of the army. Her paint cooled against her skin and her hair was pulled back in warrior's braids.

Heda rode at the very front, flanked by her imposing guards. She painted an imposing figure with her dramatic height atop her horse.

They had already been on the road for half a week and they still hadn't reached their destination. Lexa's fingers twitched eagerly for her blade even though Anya had said that it was unlikely she would see any fighting.

Eventually, as night fell, the army stopped to put up camp. As Lexa tied up her and Anya's horses, she couldn't tear her eyes away from the massive army.

" _Impressive, isn't it?_ " A voice spoke behind her, causing Lexa to jump slightly.

" _Uh, sha, Heda._ "

" _Is this your first campaign?_ "

" _Sha,_ " Lexa replied, puffing up her chest while her fingers twisted around the reins of Anya's horse.

Heda nodded sagely, staring down her long nose at Lexa. Lexa was struck by her age—she couldn't have been that much older than Anya. " _How goes your training, natblida?_ _Strata Onya is a skilled fighter and strategist._ "

Lexa nodded quickly, " _Onya says that I have become proficient in many weapons. I prefer knife throwing or a single blade._ "

" _Very good. You must keep up your lessons._ "

" _Of course, Heda._ "

" _You are very strong, Leksa kom Trigedakru. You must always remember that Heda must be strong, but also wise. It is your head_ ," she pressed a finger to Lexa's temple, " _not your heart_ ," her finger moved down to where Lexa's heart was, " _that rules._ " Lexa bobbed her head nervously, her mouth suddenly dry. " _You should rest. We will meet our enemy before the sun next sets._ "

Anya continued through the trees, searching for any sign of Lexa or Clarke. The only light came from the moon and the stars, filtering through the trees. A branch cracked on the distance and Anya's bow was notched in an instant.

She crept towards the sound, only to find that it was one of the trackers she had sent out. "Nessa," she hissed.

" _Strata Onya, I think I found their trail. The Skaikru do not know how to walk in the woods._ " Anya suppressed a laugh at that, remembering how Clarke had stumbled through the woods like a drunken idiot. " _This way,_ " Nessa led Anya through the tree, following Clarke's footprints. " _They were running from the pauna._ " Nessa spoke softly, almost to herself.

" _There,_ " Anya pointed to a thin ribbon of smoke flowing through the top of the branches. " _Smoke. They built a fire._ "

Bow still in hand, Anya tracked the smoke to its source, a small dip in the earth protecting the two leaders. Clarke was asleep by the fire while Lexa sat across from her, propped up against a tree branch.

A breeze rustled the dead leaves. A loose tree branch snapped against a tree trunk loudly.

Clarke shot up, her eyes wide and full of fear.

"It's okay," Lexa spoke softly, "You're safe."

Clarke nodded slightly, glancing around nervously. "How's your arm?"

"Hurts. You should rest."

"Or you two could both come back to camp," Anya said as she walked into the small clearing. Lexa started slightly, gripping her knife tightly.

"Anya," Lexa greeted sharply. Lexa moved to stand, pain flashing across her face. "It is good to see you."

Anya looked away from Lexa to Clarke, unable to meet Lexa's eye. "Your mother is very worried."

"My mother?"

"Yes, she is in Tondc, waiting for you. Heda, are you injured?"

Lexa shook her head firmly. Clarke replied, "She dislocated her shoulder. I set it but she should get checked by a healer."

Anya offered Lexa a hand as she stood to her feet, but Lexa ignored it. Anya shouldered her bow, following after Lexa. Lexa's body was drawn tight like a bow as she walked.

Anya's fingers curled around the wood of her bow. Clarke fell into step with Anya, her boots crunching loudly over the ground. "You still walk loudly."

Clarke let out what might have once been have been a laugh. "I've only been on earth for a month." Anya hummed in response, keeping her eyes fixed on Lexa's back as she walked with Clarke.

"Heda," Nessa began, her eyes flashing towards Clarke, "If you do not need me, I will try and catch some game. Our stores are low."

"Go." Lexa waved a hand with her uninjured arm. "Her mother died in the ripa's attack on Tondc." Pain flashed across Clarke's face, quickly followed by guilt.

"You may be our ally now but the Sky People have cause much pain and destruction."

Clarke nodded, swallowing down her words.

 _7 years earlier…._

Lexa tightened her grip on the bandage as she pressed her hand to the man's side. His breath only came in short puffs. The cart jostled them slightly and he moaned softly.

" _Almost there, Odin_." Anya said, riding along side the cart. Odin let out a grunt of acknowledgement.

Lexa stared down at her hands, coated in blood as she tried to stem the bleeding.

" _You look like my daughter._ "

" _How old is she_?"

" _Much older. She's a cook._ " Lexa smiled down at him kindly, trying not to think that he may never see his daughter again. " _Loves making me dina._ " He coughed again, blood trickling out of the corner of his mouth. " _She's a good girl._ "

" _She sounds like it_." Lexa said softly, dabbing at the corner of his mouth. " _How much further, Onya?_ "

" _Almost there._ " Anya gritted out, glancing over to the cart. The tower was still a long way off, looming out over the trees.

" _Will you tell my daughter,_ " Odin rasped, " _that I am,_ " he was cut off by a cough, more blood smearing over his lips, " _proud of her._ " Lexa nodded quickly.

" _Onya!_ " She yelped as more blood began to spill from Odin's lips. She felt blindly for a pulse, her fingers slipping against his neck.

" _Hod op! Konge fisa hir!_ " Anya barked out. A runner took off, searching for a healer within their unit. " _Keep holding the bandage over the wound._ "

Odin's eyes drifted shut. Lexa shook his shoulder in a panic.

A healer rode up alongside the cart, his clothes covered in somebody else's blood. " _Chit en's_?"

" _He started coughing up blood._ " Lexa's words stumbled out as she continued to press on his wound. The healer slid off his horse and climbed up onto the cart. Lexa shifted out of his way, her eyes wide.

The healer pressed two fingers to Odin's neck before shaking his head slightly. " _Yu gonplei ste oden._ " In the background, Anya cursed. Lexa stared down at the man, who asked her to deliver a final message to his daughter. As the healer slipped off the cart, she realized she didn't even know his daughter's name.

" _Yu gonplei ste oden_." Lexa said softly, moving away from Odin's body.

The houses of Polis began to appear in front of them as cheers erupted while Heda entered the city. Lexa couldn't tear her eyes away from the blood on her hands.

" _Leksa, get off the cart._ " Anya ordered softly, watching her second carefully. " _You can ride with me._ " Lexa clambered onto Anya's horse easily. " _It's not your fault._ "

" _I could've helped him._ "

" _You did help him._ " Anya replied softly as she felt Lexa's hands twist in her jacket. " _You gave him peace. That is all you can give sometimes._ "

Lexa remained silent while they rode into the city along the main road. Eventually they reached the courtyard in front of the Tower.

" _Leksa!_ " A voice called out as Lexa slid off Anya's horse. Costia rushed over, her eyes widening as she took in the blood on Lexa. " _Yu ait?_ "

Lexa hesitated for a moment, confusion clouding her eyes, before she nodded. " _Sha. It's not mi-_ " Lexa was cut off by Costia throwing her arms around the smaller girl. Costia clutched Lexa to her.

" _I was so worried about you._ " Lexa's cheeks instantly flushed red.

" _Were you worried about me too?_ " Anya chuckled, a slight grin on her weary face. The younger two finally separated, their fingers still tangled together. " _Let's get that blood off of you, little wolf._ "

Her cheeks still a bright pink, Lexa nodded, refusing to let go of Costia's hand. Anya rolled her eyes a bit as they walked towards the baths.

" _How long are you in Polis?_ " Lexa asked softly.

" _My nomon is travelling back houm soon, but Luna and I are staying in Polis with our uncle for the season._ " Anya could practically feel Lexa's smile even as she walked in front of the two girls.

"Are there many creatures like that?" Clarke asking, nearly stumbling over a fallen tree.

"Pauna?" Anya said, "No, there aren't many pauna. A couple though, right, Heda?" She called up to Lexa. The woman in question glanced over her shoulder, rolling her eyes.

"Don't listen to Anya, Clarke. She tends to exaggerate."

"Am I exaggerating that you and another second decided that it was a good plan to hunt down a pauna to prove that you were worthy? Because I recall you up a tree for half a day trying to escape it."

Clarke looked to Lexa, the corner of her mouth tilting up.

"I was a second." Lexa said with a shrug.

"You were nearly 15 summers." Lexa rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "But we did eat well that night."

"You killed it?" Clarke asked in amazement. "That thing was massive."

"No I didn't kill it. Ro-somebody else killed it." Anya's fingers clenched around the bow at Lexa's words. "It took half a quiver to kill the pauna."

"She did, however, have to drag it back to Polis. You smelled like an animal for a week."

" _Shof op, Onya_." Anya smirked at her former second, pleased that the other woman seemed to have lightened a bit.

"I am right. I should know. You were banished to my home for the whole week." And just like that the cheery mood between the two vanished. The muscle in Lexa's jaw tightened and she tore her eyes away.

The rest of their journey was silent.

As soon as they entered Tondc, Abby Griffin was on top of them. "Clarke, what happened? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Mom." Clarke pushed her mother away, her lips dipping into a slight frown.

While the Griffins spoke, Anya caught Lexa's arm, noting the slight wince that rolled through her.

" _Leksa,_ " Anya began.

" _Not now, Onya._ " Lexa sighed, her voice heavy with exhaustion. " _I have much to attend to._ "

" _Leksa,_ " Anya started again, rolling her eyes. " _I was wrong. I was angry._ "

" _It is forgotten._ " Lexa replied in a clipped tone. Anya swung the bow she was carrying from one shoulder to another.

" _You should rest. It's late._ "

" _There is much to do._ "

" _You need rest, Leksa. After you go to the fisa. Your shoulder._ "

" _It's fine, Onya._ " Lexa huffed out in irritation.

" _No, you need to be healthy to fight this war. Fisa, now._ "

Lexa scowled at Anya, looking not unlike she had all those years ago when Anya refused to be her mentor. " _I said no, Onya._ "

"Lexa," Clarke joined them, finally extracted from her mother's grasp. "You need to see a healer for your shoulder."

"You already set it. It is fine."

"You need to see a healer and have it properly set." Clarke crossed her arms over her chest. Lexa sighed heavily before nodding. "My mother can do it."

"I'll fetch Nyko," interjected Anya, sensing Lexa's reluctance. " _At least you listen to the skai girl._ " Anya muttered as she passed Lexa. "I'll bring him to your tent, Heda."

Anya held back a grin as she walked away. So Lexa would listen to Clarke, interesting.


End file.
